"Hi.Oh, thankssomuch for coming.I know, I know: I went casual with the outfit.It was last minute, and we wanted to be sure to talk to everyone before we leave for the empire.Oh – I'm definitelyopento talking about licensing fees, but you'll need to run that by my ketaari manager.Yeah, sure, I can send you her ping.Looking forward to hearing from your cousin; I agree, getting into cosmetics could be a good next step.Oh, we're just about ready to start.Talk soon."I stepped away from the dalloid journalist with a cheery wave and headed back to Araxis, who was currently engrossed in a serious conversation with an abayan anchor who was watching him with great curiosity.
I tipped my chin toward the haphazard podium we'd set up – I'd told the first broadcaster I reached out to that, if they managed to bring one along and turn out a crowd, I'd give them right of first refusal on my next broadcast special, which would piss off Silver Sea but it got me what I needed, so she'd have to forgive me – and Araxis extricated himself so we could make our way to the main stage for our little event.
A ketaari anchor from the Tournament broadcaster, who'd been quick to offer their public name as Red Comet in a way that suggested they expected me to know it and care, handed each of us a tiny microphone clip."We're ready to go live whenever you are," they said, yellow eyes gleaming with interest against the charcoal-black of their skin."The fees have been finalized.We appended a rental cost for the podium and for fast-tracking the appearance, and a moderate per-head bonus for the crowd.You'll understand."Their mouth flattened into a pleased line, smug."Your manager was not terribly impressed by your negotiating skills, Sashen of Creche Thiel."
"Yeah, well," I sighed, clipping the mic in place."I like to keep her on her toes.She does her best work when I fuck things up and she has tothink laterally."
Red Comet brayed out a pleased laugh, robes shifting around them as they stepped back."Yes, I can see how you would be a very challenging client."It sounded like a compliment.They then vanished back into the crowd of media broadcasters and tourists, many of whom had trekked down when we'd put the word out about what was happening in Ballast Ward.I'd already signed a number of hastily purchased Tournament souvenirs; the iless from Radiant Ward I'd met briefly had come when I'd messaged and was doing a brisk trade in knock-off mugs, photographs, shirts, and – horrifyingly – those anatomically inaccurate dolls.I'd had to sign three already.Judging from the double-headed dick the doll was sporting, they'd started their life off as brin toys before gaining a new face and losing a tail.
I'd shown one to Araxis, eyebrows raised."I mean, itwouldbe kind of fun," I admitted, and he'd looked at me with a mixture of exasperation and affection, all underpinned by the same nervousness that I felt.
Here outside our warehouse in Ballast Ward, we were sitting ducks.We'd sent Vivith and the rest of the creche back to the ship after checking in with the retrofitting dock security to make sure there hadn't been any additional incidents.Egnax had messaged to confirm that things were well, and then outlined the ways in which she would gleefully murder anyone who tried to come forhership.The shuttle would attach directly to the Creche Thiel ship, bypassing the dock entirely; it was as secure as things could possibly be.
Once the ship unmoored, they would come here, we'd load our cargo hold while chatting with media and fans, and then we'd be off with enough distance from Sozamia and the Concord's grasping influence to figure the rest of it out.Because there were things we definitely had to figure out.There were conversations we definitely needed to have.
Elethenn was still with us: I wasn't quite ready to let him out of our sight yet.He has some things to tell you, I'd told Araxis, while Elethenn had gone all glassy-eyed again as he ducked his head.And until he does, he's going to stay within reach.At that, Araxis had fixed Elethenn with such an unflinchingly disappointed stare that I'd actually feltbadlyfor him as he squirmed while we waited for the media to set up their broadcasting equipment.
For now, though –
I triple-checked our mics were off and angled Araxis to one side so that our backs were to the array of broadcasters and spectators.I raised my hands to his lapels, like I was straightening the edge of his very utilitarian jumpsuit.He was about as gussied up for a press conference as I was in my gray sweater; thank god I'd shoved it into a pack and that it was immune to wrinkles, because explaining why my jumpsuit had clearly been burned by blaster fire was definitely beyond the scope of this press conference.I let my hands rest on his chest, looking up into his eyes."Just checking," I murmured, smoothing the fabric."This is still okay?"
Araxis fluted out a breath, one of his hands resting gently against my ribs; on his features was a softer expression than I thought the moment warranted, given what we were facing – but then, he'd always reserved his softness for me."I should be askingyou, Sashen.Are you certain?And – of course you may change your mind at any point, regardless of what we say today.That has always been the case, back in the Thenat Cluster, here on Sozamia, and it will be true in Xitera as well.It will be true always."
I knew that, and he was right that this was different.This wasn't a contract with an exit date.This wasn't feeling out the edges of our relationship to see if it could work for us.This wasn't doing anything in careful, measured steps.
Then again, yesterday I'd been scrubbing blood from the grating of Creche Thiel's ship.I mean, fuck, in the past day I'd murderedthree peopleto keep Araxis and the creche safe.
When had I ever done anything in a careful and cautious way?
I shrugged."You know me," I murmured, pinching the collar of his jumpsuit between my fingers as if examining something, like the very first time I'd spoken to him way back in the den."I'm a bit of a show-off.And I wouldverymuch like to show you off."
He silvered like I knew he would, which was good.I'd rather see him blushing than the brittle, terrified head of house he'd been on the flight from the ship to Sozamia, although I would take him however he came.I would take him in all of his facets.I clicked the mics on and we stepped up to the podium.Araxis's hand settled in the small of my back as he straightened himself to full height, every inch the prince he'd been on broadcast.
"Our thanks to all in attendance for joining us," Araxis said, and above us, a wave of silver cameras flashed in the cavernous space of Ballast Ward.
"And thank you to everyone watching later," I added, turning on my brightest dancer's smile, which I'd been told was nearly blinding.If I was able to dazzle everyone with my smile, maybe none of them would notice that I looked like I'd been in a fire fight – which, of course, Ihadbeen."It means a lot for us to be able to share our news with the people who've supported us since we first met at the Galactic Tournament of Superiority."
I could hear the whir of cameras flitting overhead.I didn't let myself look: I'd learned that much from being on broadcast.
Araxis's fingers twitched against me; I could feel them through my sweater, his touch firm and certain."In my culture," he said, "it is understood that there will be a difficult period of transition when a virra declares for a new creche.Our Sashen has also entered into abayan culture from the outside, and so we anticipated that this adjustment would take more time and be more – tumultuous."
I glanced at him, noting his hesitation over the word, and his stare met mine.The corner of his mouth turned down, his jaw pulsing with tension, and I knew what he was thinking, as clearly as if I were thinking it.
Ithadbeen difficult, of course it had been, and he'd made it harder because of the circumstances that had pushed me into the creche.
But that didn't matter now.Or, it did, but only because it was the foundation we'd worked to rebuild together.I angled my body closer to his, nudging him with my shoulder and smiling.His eyelashes fluttered, just a little, before his chin shifted upwards and he smoothed away any uneasiness.
"I wouldliketo say that the many creches we met with during our stay on Sozamia were welcoming to Sashen, given what he has been through.Unfortunately, this has not been universally true.We had anticipated that we might be afforded some privacy while Sashen adjusted to life with a creche and acclimated to our culture; this was not the case.It is a testament to his grace that he has comported himself with dignity and patience during our time on Sozamia.We do wish to extend our most sincere gratitude to the crecheless abaya of Radiant Ward who were sure to treat our Sashen with the respect and care he deserves.I invite and encourage any who wish to return to Xitera to send messages directly to our home on Thelessia, as we will be accepting petitioners upon our return."
Right.Well, the rest was up to me.I looked out at the crowd and was pleasantly surprised to see that the weapons provisioner, the pink sephear Imisu, had come down to watch.I locked eyes with her, her mandibles flaring with happiness, and when I spoke, I addressed her directly.That was less daunting than talking to the whole galaxy.
"I've never really had time in my life to – think about things," I said."And Araxis has encouraged me to really reflect on what I want in my life.The last time we were at a media panel together, he said that he respects my autonomy, and he's shown that to me every day since we left Thenat-6.Even when I found the culture shock to be… a lot, or the welcome into abayan society a bit chilly, Creche Thiel has very quickly become my family, and there is nowhere I'd rather be than by Araxis's side.I'm happy to say that I feel like I have my feet under me now; I know travelling to Xitera will be another adjustment for both of us, but we're excited to take up residence in Adralne and start our next chapter together.I am eager to meet the many fine abaya who live in the city of spires and am honoured to soon be able to call Xitera home."I assumed the live translation would take care of that for the viewers who didn't speak abayan.
The sephear's eyes glistened with interest as she listened.I took a steadying breath, and continued."Araxis and I have spent a lot of time talking about what we want our future to look like, and it's been important to both of us that we look for ways to acknowledge who I am as well.Anyone who watched the Galactic Tournament knows that I have a… fraught relationship with the place I came from, but there are still some cultural traditions that feel meaningful.I –"
Suddenly, the words left me.I wasn't sure how to explain this part, because it felt simultaneously disingenuous and incredibly vulnerable, like somehow it could be both a lie that meant nothing to me and a deep truth I was having a hard time looking at.The silence stretched as I turned it over, and then Araxis raised his hand to stroke the shape of my shoulder, his palm steady.I leaned into him a little more, and set myself back on track.
"I've also spent a lot of time with different people from across the galaxy, who have their own beautiful cultural traditions, some of which made more sense to me than the ones I grew up with, and some of which were kind of like echoes, but in a way that felt more authentic and welcoming to who I am as well," I continued."And – you know, I'm going about this in a very long way, and really, I think we've said the important and serious part, haven't we?"
