“I’ll see you tomorrow!”Ella says in a louder tone, so that the noise of the cars can’t drown her out.She waves goodbye with her blue gloves, smiling, and keeps walking toward the front steps of her hotel.
I stand there watching her silhouette disappear into the bustle of the hotel.
A few more seconds pass before I’m able to move myself to leave.
A few blocks and several minutes later, I step inside my apartment.
All the lights are off.Asher’s wallet is on the kitchen counter, next to a colorful pamphlet with a picture of the Empire State Building and a map of the Metropolitan Museum of Art.His parents are a lovable couple who match their outfits and run on an endless battery.Asher surely can’t keep up and has already fallen asleep.
I open the fridge door, let the light spill into the dark kitchen.Cold air brushes my face, but I don’t reach for anything.I close it again.I’m not hungry.I just can’t bring myself to go to bed.Not with the echo of her laughter still hanging in the air.
I’m restless.
The night still clings to me, the way her blue eyes caught the glow of the Christmas market, like they were reflecting something I hadn’t seen in years.Like we hadn’t just time-traveled back into something we left behind.
I walk across the living room.
I can’t bring myself to lie down yet.
Because if I do, I’ll have to close my eyes.
And if I close my eyes, I’ll see her again.
Chapter 45
Ella
December 29th, 2008
Monday
“I’m so sorry!”I gasp for air, approaching the bench where Miles is seated and where I was also supposed to be seated 45 minutes ago.“I caught the right bus, but in the opposite direction.”He laughs and holds out a bottle of water to me.“I mean, it was the wrong bus.The same number and wrong direction,” I say.
It was so silly.I began to realize that the bus was not following the route I had planned on my printed city map, and after doubting myself for a few minutes, and paying close attention to street signs, I had to ask the driver to please enlighten me.
A smile remains visible on his lips.
“What?”I ask.
“You’re just… still the small-town girl,” he mocks me.
“For your information, I also went to the city from time to time back then, and I also caught buses.And!”I add that lastandword louder, “I don’t live in a small town anymore.I moved to Verryn a long time ago when I went to college, remember?”
“Yeah,” he says, “but you can’t take the small-town out of the girl.”
He knows that’s true, I know it too, and I don’t mind at all.
But that’s it.
I don’t mind.I realize thatI simply don’t mind.
Chapter 46
Miles
December 29th, 2008
Monday
