It sounded like a fucking nightmare.
But what about everything that happened?a little nagging voice whispered in my head.What about going with him to San Diego and helping him confront his Beta?
My own memories, and possibly life, were at stake by then, though,I replied to that voice.
So why were you angry with him when he told you he would return you home safe and sound?the voice insisted.
Because that sounded like an excuse!I snapped back.Besides, the danger from the Sable Syndicate, whatever they are, was still unresolved, so that must’ve meant I was still in danger too.
I could swear my own inner voice was laughing at me, taunting me.He said he would put security on you to ensure your safety, though. But there is no being safe fromhim.He said he’s a bigger danger, after all.He’s a werewolf, a creature from storybooks. Why did you so readily trust him? Why did you believe with your entire heart that he wouldn’t hurt you, body and soul?
I’m his Eteria,I cried back.He couldn’t hurt me, or he would risk hurting himself!
But is that even the truth?the voice whispered.He said your soul is bound tohim, after all, not that your souls are bound to each other ...
“I feel pain where you were wounded on your side,” I said now, my voice distorted somehow, as I felt suddenly lightheaded. “That’s because I’m your Eteria.”
It wasn’t a question, since now, I knew the answer.
This wasn’t just about brainwashing and being able to love only him.
It was also about much more than simply my soul being connected to his—or rather, tohim.
“Yes,” he replied in a lower voice.
“Because my soul is bound to you,” I murmured, and saying the words out loud now, after what he’d just revealed, sounded utterly unbelievable all of a sudden. On the surface, it sounded like I was his soulmate or something—but this couldn’t be. It wasmewe were talking about.
And my position was always to look up to men like him, not to get involved with them.
“Yes,” he said again, gritting his teeth this time.
Pain spread across my chest at his obvious disgust at the situation. Of course he would be disgusted. Why would someone like him wantmeas an Eteria?
The thought caused my breath to catch and the pain to turn sharper, deeper, and so I swerved my thoughts in a different direction. Returning to focus on the matter at hand.
Recalling what Enoch and his assistant, Anais, had talked about before Lucien shifted into his human form and kicked them out, I had a feeling I finally got it. “You’re doing something to prevent me from feeling the wound on your back,” I deduced, watching him closely.
His lifeless expression suddenly twisted into obvious displeasure. “I wish you didn’t realize that,” he growled, angry, but obviously not at me.
I folded my arms. “This is why it takes you so long to heal,” I said, glaring at him now. “You’re trying to protect me from the pain.”
He rose to his feet suddenly, and I did everything I could to keep my eyes on his face. Because now that I knew what it meant to be his Eteria, he suddenly no longer seemed like a statue in a museum.
He seemed far too real. Tangible.
And I was terrified I would forget myself.
Yet my heartbeat quickened when he grabbed a pair of sweatpants and put them on before he drew closer to me. “This is not the only reason,” he said, stopping when he was before me, forcing me to tilt my head back. “So don’t worry about it.”
I jumped to my feet and closed the gap between us, folding my arms as I scowled. “If I’m injured, would you feel the injury?”
He scowled back, eyes flashing as he saw where I was going with it. “Yes,” he gritted out.
“And I would not be able to block you from feeling the pain, right?” I pushed, glowering at him now.
He almost bared his teeth. “I can take the pain,” he growled, eyes narrowed. “You’re a human. Pain like what I feel on my back will make you feel like you’re dying.”
“Fuck that,” I spat, shaking with fury, yet I didn’t know what else I could say to convince him. He seemed resolute. Set in his own decision.
