I turned around as I heard a throat clear. I was so distracted by my thoughts of Vera, that I didn’t notice her stepping into the kitchen. “Hi.”
She smiled and took a step closer to the island, propping her elbows on the counter and giving me a perfect view down her shirt. Her chest was visible and glistened with sweat. I tried, and failed to look away. She was doing that on purpose. Trying to get me to cave. It was working.
Every day I spent looking at those arms, or her ass, I couldn’t breathe. And listening to her talk? I had to cross my legs, hard. But the worst part was her personality and how she treated me.
It would’ve been so much easier to forget about our night if she was a dick. But no, she had to agree to be my fake date, bring me home-cooked meals everyday, and treat me like I was something special when we weren’t anything but a little more than strangers to each other.
It was almost annoying how she treated me so well. I couldn’t give her a relationship, but I needed to find some way to repay her for everything she’s done for me so far. I guess this lunch was a start.
I finally took my eyes off her chest and we made eye contact for the first time in what seemed like forever. Her smile was so wide and her eyebrows were raised in question. I’d definitely been caught staring at her chest.
I cleared my throat and sat the plate in front of her. “I made a summer salad bowl. It’s got mixed greens, onions, feta, watermelon, with a balsamic glaze, and I added a few chicken breasts on top. I figured you’d need something cold and filled with protein. I hope that’s okay. It’s not going to be as good asyour grandmother’s cooking, of course, but you won’t get sick from eating it. At least, I hope not.”
She laughed and took a seat at the island. “It’s perfect. Thank you, Cara. You didn’t have to make me anything.”
I shrugged. “It’s okay. I was making it anyway and thought I’d offer you some.”
I reached up into the cabinet and took out two salad bowls, filling them both. I also grabbed the lemonade pitcher out of the refrigerator and poured two glasses. She watched me the entire time and smiled before taking a sip. Thankfully she didn’t make a comment about how it was strawberry lemonade. The fact that I knew it was her favorite and made it for that reason was irrelevant.
She didn’t say anything, so we sat there and ate in silence until I started to get itchy in my skin and had to break the silence.
“Can you cook?” I cringed at myself. Her abuela cooked, of course Vera knew how to as well. She also had made me a dessert before, but that was different.
She didn’t laugh at me or judge me for my stupid question. She only smiled and nodded. “Si. My abuela taught me when I was little. I’ll have to cook for you sometime.”
I didn’t think there would be a time where that was a possibility, but instead of saying that, I found myself saying, “I’d like that.”
Okay, so apparently my brain had split in half and had stopped talking to each other. One part wanted nothing to do with Vera aside from our current situation. But the other part? Oh, that was the dangerous part.
That part of my brain was connected to my body and they both wanted her. They both wanted to feel her skin against mine again, and they both wanted to find out what it took to make her beg. Okay, I really needed to get it together.
“Speaking of my abuela, she’s requested your attendance for dinner. She wants to meet the woman who loves her cooking so much.”
My fork paused halfway to my mouth. “Oh. That’s sweet of her. Does she think we’re…” I let the implication hang in the air.
She shook her head, seeing where my line of thinking was heading. “No. She knows we are only friends. She just wants to meet you, that’s all.”
Vera and I were friends. The thought put a smile on my face. “Okay. Tell me when and I’ll be there. It’s the least I can do since you’re lying to my friends for me and all.”
She smiled. “I’ll let her know. And I’d already agreed to do that anyway. I just want to do what I can to see you smile.”
“That sounds like we’re back to normal.”
She frowned. “What do you mean?”
A blush crept onto my cheeks and I pushed a hair behind my ear. I was trying not to overthink things and I really didn’t want to bring it up, but my brain couldn’t let it go. Something inside me wanted us to be okay.
“It’s just, this whole week, you haven’t been flirty like you used to be.” I shrugged, trying to pretend it didn’t bother me.
“Oh.” She set her fork down and took a drink of lemonade. She shifted in her seat. “I told you I was backing off. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. You’ve told me you’re not interested and I respect that.”
My shoulders fell. I didn’t like seeing her so defeated. If only things were different. I reached across the counter and grabbed her hand, holding it in mine. “You haven’t made me uncomfortable, Vera. Please know that. I just…” I trailed off, not knowing what to say. I couldn’t tell her that I wasn’t attracted to her, on some level, but I also couldn’t tell her that we could be anything other than what we were now.
“Thank you for lunch. I should get back to work.” She took her dish to the sink and started rinsing it off before putting it on the drying rack on the counter.
She turned back around to face me and looked as if she wanted to say something, but decided against it as she walked past me and headed back to my office.
I put my face in my hands and groaned. What was I doing? There was this amazing woman who wanted me, and just wanted to make me happy, and I was denying myself that? If only things were different. If only she was someone different, we would’ve already been together by now.
