Jasper goes still. “I don’t really think I need it, but that’s not to say I never will. I have a lot of coping skills. Besides, the department has resources if I need to use them.”
“I think I might talk to someone. Luca gave me a list of people.”
It’s not something I’m overly excited about, but I’m sure between growing up in the environment that I did and all the stress of the last year, it wouldn’t be the worst thing.
Everything I’ve learned about emotional regulation and healthy coping skills, I’ve learned myself. And it’s been more trial and error than anything else. It might be nice to have a professional try to help me untangle the mess Mom and Melvinleft me with. Especially since I owe it to the kids to help them untangle their own messes. Salem, especially.
“I think that might be a good idea,” Jasper says.
I can’t help but laugh at that. “So you finally agree. I’m fucked up.”
Jasper laughs too, then kisses my forehead again. “You’re not fucked up. All things considered, I’d say you’re pretty well-adjusted, but there’s nothing wrong with seeking help, and if you think you’d benefit from it, I say go for it. I’ve gone back to therapy multiple times in my life. Mostly in my twenties.”
Something to think about for sure. “I just want to make sure I’m the best version of myself that I can be.”
“Makes sense, baby boy. I’ll support you no matter what.”
I snuggle deeper into him. “I know. I love you.”
Humming, he squeezes me. “I love you too.”
“So what’s the plan today?” I ask. “I can take Salem to Theo and Hunter’s, and then we can take Nora to the party together?”
“Sounds perfect to me.” Jasper cups my face and kisses me. “I’ll go start on breakfast if you wanna get a little more sleep.”
Untangling myself from him, I sit up. “Nah. I’ll come with you.”
Halfway through making breakfast, Salem stumbles his way into the kitchen, his hair sticking up in every direction and his eyes bleary. “Smells good.”
Jasper laughs. “Did we summon you with nothing but the smell of food? I’m impressed.”
He shrugs. “I’m hungry.”
He doesn’t eat nearly as much as I think he should, given that he’s growing and needs nutrients, but hey, what can you do?
The only thing I can really figure is that we just keep showing up and offering him food until, hopefully, he realizes that it’s not something he has to fight for or go without.
After climbing onto the barstool at the counter, Salem drums his fingers on the marble. “What time are we going to Hunter and Theo’s?”
“Theo said we could bring you whenever. I thought maybe we’d go after breakfast.”
He smiles at me. Fucking smiles. Maybe going to the farm really will be healing for him. It seems like nothing I do is working, and I’ll take any help I can get.
“What about Nora?” he asks.
I cock my head. “What about her?”
“She’s not going, right?”
I shoot Jasper a look. At some point, we’re going to have to talk about how he treats her and what the fuck is going on with that, but today is not that day. Hell, I think I’d almost prefer for him to be beating people up in her honor than… whatever the fuck this is.
“She’s not going,” Jasper says, answering for me. “She’ll stay here with me while Arlo takes you over there, and then one of us will come pick you up later. Sound good?”
Salem nods, what looks like relief making his shoulders drop. “Okay.”
Nora joins us right as we’re finishing up cooking, and as soon as we all eat, Salem rushes off to his room to change clothes.
When he comes back out, he stands in the doorway of the living room, almost nervously. “I’m, uh… I’m ready.”
