“I’ve been angry for so long,” I admit. “I’ve been blaming you and Damien, but you’re just as much victims in all of this as anyone else.” He flinches at my mention of the word victim. I’m sure it’s a label he loathes.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for the lies and the secrets.”
“And I’m sorry for unleashing the anger I have towards your father onto you. You didn’t deserve it.”
Both of us seem to let out a deep sigh like we had been holding our breath ever since that conversation in the war room. I don’t want to fight him, or Damien for that matter. Everything got so screwed up, but the only person deserving of the blame is King Cimmerian. My only priority now is making sure he dies because of it.
Chapter 25
Ryder
Ishouldn’t feel so relieved knowing she doesn’t actually hate me, but I can’t help it. The feeling of disappointing her is one of the worst feelings I’ve ever experienced. Spending all that time with her in the Sector, being the cruel prince everyone knows me to be was easy. That part of me is natural to access. But she demands more.
“Ryder!” I turn to find Emeric chasing after me up the skull-lined stairs leading to Grimstone.
“What do you need?”
“I know it’s late, but I wanted to see if you would get in some training with me.” There are lines etched into his face like he’s been deep in thought the past few hours. Something feels off. His usual upbeat demeanor is now strained and there’s a look of desperation behind his eyes.
“Yeah. Of course I have time to kick your ass.” It’s a sorry attempt to cheer him up, but it earns me a grin.
When we get to the Center, the two remaining occupants excuse themselves. It’s not always the reaction I get here in the Shadow Lands, but there are plenty of newcomers who are still warming up to the idea that I’m not someone they should instinctively recoil from.
Emeric grabs one of the double-ended swords, so I do the same. “Amaya’s been kicking my ass with this thing and I’m growing tired of it.”
“Well, I’ll do my best to help you but she’s a natural.” I spin the handle in between my fingers, getting comfortable with the feel of it. “Shit, half the time I spar with her she even pushesmyskill level. There’s a reason most people stick to the longsword.”
“The deadly prince, challenged by a Sector witch? Don’t let the others hear you.” He looks around the empty room with a sly smirk.
“Yeah, well don’t let Amaya hear you refer to her as only a Sector witch.”
“Touché. She’d probably have my head for it.”
“Without a doubt. Now, let’s see what you got.”
The sound of our clashing blades fills the room. His technique isn’t terrible, but I can tell he hesitates and during battle there is no room for that. Once I’ve assessed his movements enough, I knock the sword out of his hand and send it flying across the mat.
“Damnit!”
Emeric’s outburst catches me off guard.
“Stop,” I order, cutting off his reach with my own sword. He stands back up, leaving his weapon on the mat. “What’s going on?”
He tosses his head back. “Nothing.”
“Doesn’t look like nothing.”
“It doesn’t matter. Let’s just keep going.”
I walk over and sheath the sword back in its stand. “I don’t think so. Not until you tell me what’s really got you all worked up.”
“It’s my brother, okay?” He throws his arms out in frustration. “I miss him. I miss who my brother was before—” His voice cracks.
Although Elias only lost his leg, he lost more than that. He lost his identity.
“I know it’s been difficult—”
“Difficult?” he snaps. “He doesn’t talk to anyone! Especially not me. Our own parents don’t even recognize him anymore and it’s breaking their hearts.” He looks at the ground and shakes his head. “He’s my best friend and there’s nothing I can do to help him.”
