“Excuse me?”
“Ohh, that’s right. You caught our girl doing the walk of shame.” With one quick motion, I send her sword flying out of her hand and across the mat. “Jeez,” she whines, waving her hands at me. “Sorry I mentioned it.”
“No, you’re not.”
She walks over and picks up her sword. “You’re right. I’m not.” Her long braids whip around to her back when she turns to face me. “You should know I’m on your side, though.”
“Meaning?”
“Meaning I’m rooting for you. Sure, Damien is great and all, but I notice how she is with you.” She’s piqued my interest and I hate that I feel the need to follow up.
“And how’s that?”
“She’s herself and yet more. You challenge her when she needs it and you’re there for her when she needs it.” She moves the tip of her blade in light circles on the mat. “She told me about your time together in Cyron. How you trained her. How you gave her the book to decode her father’s letter. How you took her to the Dread Woods and asked for nothing in return.”
I scoff at her attempt to compliment me. “Those things were nothing.”
“To you maybe. But to her they were everything.”
“You’re gonna make me blush,” I say sarcastically.
She throws her head back, letting out an exaggerated sigh. “I’m being serious. You were there for her when I couldn’t be. That goes a long way with me.”
“So, that’s what all this is about. You think you owe me?”
“What? No! That’s not what this is,” she bites back.
“Oh, yeah? Then why are you telling me all of this?”
She crosses the space between us, stopping in front of me. “Because there is a war coming and there’s a very real possibility that I may not be here after it’s all said and done. But she will be. Either in this life or her next and I’d feel a hell of a lot better knowing she has you to help her keep living.”
A mountain-sized pit forms in my stomach. I know people will die. A lot of people, including those I care about. But I hadn’t yet thought about the losses she will endure. How many more deaths can she handle before she’s beyond repair? Amaya is her world. If she were to lose her, I’m not sure she would ever recover.
“Look,” she continues. “I know it’s not fair to put that on you, but when it comes to her I—”
“I know.”
“Promise me you’ll be there for her.”
“Hey, you’re still here. There’s no need to—”
“Promise me!” she demands, tightening her grip on her sword like she’ll plunge it through me if I don’t.
“I promise. I’ll be there for her. Always.”
“Good. Now, show me how to do that trick with the blade.”
It’s been hours since my conversation with Amaya and I haven’t been able to get it out of my head. Her words. The promise. They just keep running on a loop in my mind.
I’ve become so numb to death over the years. It wasn’t until I saw Reign turn to ash that I felt the gut-wrenching pain that comes with such loss.
For years now I have kept my emotions for others locked away. After my father saw to Elizabeth’s death and my mother and brother were murdered, I vowed to never let myself care for anyone that much again. Of course, I still care about Artemus and Jace and the others but not in that way. I’m prepared for them to die. I suppose when you live as long as I do, you grow used to the idea of saying goodbye to people.
But it’s different with Reign. No matter how much I try to keep her on the outside of the cage that conceals my cold heart, she somehow finds a way to slip through the bars. She’s like a poison taking over my mind and body. I can only prolong the death she’s sure to bring, but there’s no reversing it. Her poison has already spread, injecting itself into my veins. Claiming my heart without even realizing it.
“You ready?”
As if my thoughts have conjured her.
