“And you stress me out,” I grumbled under my breath. “Even more than thinking of my previously straight brother fucking his new husband does.”
She threw back her head and laughed. “Keeping you off-balance is a gift, my friend. And it brings me joy.”
I couldn’t help but allow a partial grin. “It brings me something. Not sure what yet.”
She leaned over and ruffled my hair. “I like you. I didn’t expect to make a friend like you when I moved here.”
I wanted to ask why the heck she’d moved to a small town like the Hollow if she hadn’t planned to make friends, but I didn’t want to seem judgy. Not when her friendly affection warmed my heart and helped mitigate my recent rejection just a little bit.
“Want to come over and watch a movie or something?” I offered. “I heardDeath Comes to Pemberleywas on tonight, and I can make Marco’s chicken salad recipe?—”
“No can do,” she said, standing up and chucking her empty cup into a nearby receptacle. “Got a hot date with a chick I met at the knife-throwing thing.”
I stared at her. “What?”
“You heard me. Just becauseyouare determined to overthink Simon’s offer until you’re old and gray doesn’t meanI’mgonna be sleeping alone tonight.” She winked. “Look, I get what you’re saying about Jack. You have hashtag real-feels. But you also need relief. And you were willing to make do with a friends-with-bennies thing for Jack, right? So why not with cute Simon? Think about it, okay? See you tomorrow!”
I scrambled after her. “Wait, I need details. How the heck did you meet someone at the knife place? I was with you the whole time!”
“Ladies’ room,” she said with a shrug. “She said if I wanted more practice, her family has some dead trees on their property we could throw things at. Texted me her number and added a shit ton of emojis.” She grinned. “In like Flynn, baby. I don’t know why dudes need to make stuff so complicated.”
I wrinkled my nose. “She asked you to throw things at dead trees… and that’s an invitation for sex?”
“Sure. Throwing stuff around is excellent foreplay. I’m gonna score in all the ways.” She reached out a fist to knuckle-bump me, but I refused and shoved my hands in my shorts pockets instead.
“Dear god. Literallyeveryonein this town is having sex except me. It’s fuckinginjustice, is what it is!”
Crys’s eyes narrowed, and she grabbed me by the front of my shirt. “Okay, Hawkins, I’ve tried being patient, but maybe you need some tough love instead, so listen up. Plenty of men in this town would love nothing more than to deflower your virgin ass, and you know it. The trouble is, you’re hung up on the one guy who won’t. You have an idea in your head that he’s the perfect guy and you’re meant to have this perfect love, but perfection is for storybooks. In real life, sometimes people need to fuck up before they figure shit out. Sometimes, their timing is off. And that’s okay. Real life issupposedto be hard and messy. That’s how you learn shit. That’s why it’s fun. But if you keep thinking of Jack as one of your romance heroes and wondering why he’s not sticking to the script, you’re gonna be miserable forever, boo. You are responsible for your own happiness. Don’t wait for him to fix your life. Go out and take action. Grab what you want.” She paused for a moment. “But, like, wear a seat belt and remember to bring protection. Okay?” She patted my chest gently, smoothing my shirt back into place. “Okay. Good talk. See you in the morning.”
She strode across the parking lot in the direction of the room she rented in an old house on Pine Street, leaving me staring after her.
How ridiculous!
I wasnotwaiting around for perfection, and I certainly didn’t expect anyone to fix my life for me. I worked hard, dang it. And my life was full of family and friends and projects that needed my help. I liked it just fine!
Well…
Aside from the wanting-someone-who-refused-to-want-me-back thing. And the developers-ruining-my-town thing. And the random, uncontrolled bursts of anger. And my brothers treating me like I was a porcelain doll. And feeling like a loser because I made love to my hand so often I worried I was developing carpal tunnel syndrome while it seemed every other human in town was getting down and dirty. And?—
Okay, so maybe Crys had a point.
I’d talked a good game about getting on a hookup app and finding a date, but I hadn’t actually done a damn thing about it. I’d set my sights on Jack the same way I’d focused on the target at the knife-throwing place, heaving myself at him with all my might… and in both cases, I’d fallen way short of the mark and had nothing to show for it but a bruised ego and a sore wrist.
Maybe I was frustrated Jack wouldn’t join me in the fight against Evola because I’d gotten used to relying on his support and his strength. Because it was scary to think about doing it on my own.
Maybe I was so angry these days because I’d dammed up my frustrations about so many things for so long, not wanting to hurt or offend anyone, that now I was boiling over like a teakettle.
Maybe it was time to actuallymakea change instead of talking about it over and over.
Maybe I needed to take Simon up on his offer.
The next morning, after a very long and sleepless night stuck in the farmhouse with a pair of very amorous newlyweds and a pair of sixty-something lovers under the influence, I dragged myself into the shower and got myself to the diner with seconds to spare before my shift started.
I wasn’t the only straggler.
Crys walked in with me, wearing the same clothes she’d worn the day before, rocking sex hair and a dewy smile. Katey was escorted in by Nate Kimstock from the auto shop, and the pair spent ten minutes standing in the doorway cooing and exchanging goofy smiles before Jack fixed Nate with a raised eyebrow and folded arms that sent him scurrying off. Even Jack was bleary-eyed, smelled vaguely of woodsmoke, and winced with every movement like he’d spent the night wrestling a wild animal.
An image of Handsy Donny appeared in my brain, and my stomach dropped. Had Jack hooked up withhimlast night after turning me down? Wouldn’tthatbe the cherry on this shit sundae?
