Page 88 of Riding High

Her eyes met his, and she saw his banked anger and frustration.Not at her, but at the Bancrofts, at himself.He touched her jaw with the tips of his fingers.‘I should’ve planted my feet, Eden.Last week, I should’ve told you that you were a priority and told you that I believed you.’He paused.

‘I fucked up.’

It was a simple, but heartfelt statement, she heard the disappointment in his voice and it was all directed at himself.He was so used to doing everything well, accustomed to knowing how all the moving parts of his life fitted together, who did what and where and how.But here, with her, he looked as confused as she often felt.She tipped her head, a silent entreaty for him to continue.

‘I’m used to thinking about the world in terms of how it affects me, how it affects my family,’ Jed explained, linking his hands behind his head.‘But this last week has taught me a fling with you isn’t enough.’

Her heart bounced off her ribcage.‘It isn’t?’

‘Is it enough for you?’he demanded, his eyes bright in his tanned face.

‘No, but we were talking about you and your feelings,’ she gently pointed out.

‘And I’m not having any fun,’ he muttered.

She smiled at his sullen tone.‘Tell me what you want, Jed.From me, and us.’

He sighed, pushed both his hands into his hair and gave her a wild-eyed, I-don’t-know-what-I-am-doing look.‘I’m not good at love, Eden.I’m still learning.I’ve always believed that it had to be earned, and I can’t help thinking that I’ve done nothing to deserve you.’

‘Jed…’

‘I hurt you.I didn’t stand up for you.I didn’t instinctively believe you.’

‘I don’t know how to be a partner or a lover or’—he swallowed, panic in his eyes—‘more.It’s not something I’m good at.’

Excellence was bred into his DNA, and she had no doubt he’d be an incredible partner or… more.

He pushed an agitated hand into his hair.‘But I want to try.I want to love you, hell, Idolove you,’ he corrected, his words as fast as bullets from a machine gun.‘But I also want you tofeelloved, I want you to know what it means to be at the front and centre of someone’s world.

‘Because you are the centre of mine,’ he added.He rested his forehead against hers and closed his eyes.‘Be mine, Eden.Let me love you.Love me back.Be the heart of my family.’

Tension seeped from her muscles, loosened her shoulders and the pressure in her head.She gripped his shirt and twisted the fabric around her fingers.She was not going to let horse dander spoil this moment!Happiness, soft and sweet, filled her.‘Okay,’ she murmured.

He lowered her head to kiss her temple, her cheek, the side of her mouth.‘I swear I’ll make you happy, sweetheart.I’ll put you first.I’ll make you a priority.’

So, when Jed Harris committed, he went all in.She tipped her head back to gaze into the gorgeous eyes she would look at for the rest of her life.‘Thank you.Thank you for giving me a family, for saying that.’She lifted her hands to hold his face, his stubble rough under her palms.She tasted the unfamiliar words on her tongue, a sentence she’d never spoken before, one that was as unfamiliar as Farsi.‘I love you.’

He seemed to understand the importance of this first time, the full impact of her words because his eyes glistened with emotion.She couldn’t say he was tearing up, but it was close.‘I love you, too.So much.I’ll love your more tomorrow, and the day after.’

When their lips met, she tasted his banked passion, all the words they’d yet to speak, the stories they’d yet to tell.Trust and faith, laughter and magic, it was a dizzying combination of flavours.This was the essence of who they were, what they meant to each other, a taste and scent profile that would form the basis of their life together.Pure, intense and, for now, uncomplicated.

Oh, there were going to be times when they’d lose the intensity, when anger and misunderstandings would cloud their feelings, when sadness or stress would taint their relationship, and when they would think they’d lost the magic.But she’d remind him, and herself, of this moment when time stood still and everything seemed possible.

Instead of deepening their kiss and letting passion sweep them away, Jed pulled back and gathered her to him, his big arms around her, enveloping her in his strength and solidness.Nothing could touch her when Jed held her like this.

She looked at his long legs.His boots were dusty and scuffed, his white jodhpurs stretched over muscled thighs.She couldn’t wait to go home, she wanted him naked again, to be at the mercy of his clever hands and wicked tongue.

Jed sat up straight and pulled a face.‘Don’t look at me like that, Eden.We still have to go back to the tent,’ he complained.

‘Do we have to?’she whined.‘We could just sneak away and spend the rest of the night in bed.’

‘Oh, we’re going to do that, but not for a few hours yet,’ Jed confidently stated.He picked up a strand of her hair and wound it around her fingers.‘Once I get you to my place, I’m not letting you go.Thank God my cottage is an easy commute to the big house where, I hear, Troyden is turning the music room into a study for you.’

The music room was a smallish reception room, with bright light and an awesome view of the polo field where Jed routinely practised.She’d have to put her back to the window or else she would never get any work done when Jed was training.

‘So you know about Troyden’s offer for me to run his foundation?’she asked, crossing one leg over the other.She placed her elbow on her knee and rested her chin in the palm of her hand.‘Are you okay with that?’

‘Very.You’ll consult with Troyden, but you’ll report to Al via Justin.I know it will work out just fine.’