But I guess that’s the thing about office gossip, the tiniest spark can turn into a blazing fire in the hands of the wrong people.
I wrung my hands in my lap, my thoughts already spiralling out of control.Who all had they told? How much did they know? Had they thought we were being unprofessional? Was Neil in trouble too? Was that why he hadn’t come in today? Did Tanya have any idea about all this?
I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself.None of this matters, I told myself.They know now. It’s best to own up to your mistake like a mature adult.‘This is about me and Neil,isn’t it?’ I did my best to sound composed, reminding myself that hysteria was a female employee’s worst enemy. ‘Yes, something did happen. I promise you, we weren’t unprofessional, but we did get close on the trip. And whatever it was … it’s over now. It won’t happen again.’
There was silence. Stunned silence. Swati looked at Varun and he looked right back at her. Their expressions screamed the same thing:What the hell is she talking about?
‘Kavya,’ Swati said slowly, for once seeming like she didn’t quite know how to proceed. ‘That’s … not what we were referring to.’
Next to her, Varun frowned, rubbing his forehead with two fingers and a thumb. ‘Wait … what do you mean by you and Neil?’
The horror of what I’d just done hit me in slow motion. I’d admitted to a crime no one had accused me of. ‘Nothing,’ I said quickly, as if that would magically erase my admission from their memories. The two of them exchanged another puzzled look.
And then it struck me, with the worst kind of clarity, that this could only be about one other thing. But I wasn’t stupid enough to throw myself under a second bus, so I forced myself to ask, ‘Sorry, whatwereyou guys referring to?’
‘A concern was raised about, er, the qualifications listed on your resume,’ Swati said, choosing her words carefully.
I must’ve looked baffled, because she felt the need to clarify. ‘Your degree, Kavya. The one from the prestigious college listed on your CV? We received information that it may not be accurate.’
My mouth went completely dry. I opened it to respond, but it felt like someone had shoved sandpaper down my throat.
Swati tapped her fingers on the table. ‘We went back to check our records and realized we don’t actually have your degreecertificate on file.’ She paused, giving me an encouraging HR-smile so fake it made me want to scream. ‘So if you could send it over and help clear all of this up …’ She trailed off, then added in a measured tone, ‘Or at least this confusion about your degree.’
My pulse roared in my ears. Heat was creeping up my face and I could no longer feel my fingers and toes. A million thoughts were scrambling in my head for my attention, tripping over each other as I tried to make sense of what I’d just heard.My degree. The NYU lie. They knew. They’d found out. How had they found out? Someone had told them. But no one knew! Except …
‘As for your relationship with your, um, intern …’ Swati continued in that patronizing tone of a principal addressing a troublesome teenager. ‘That, I’m afraid, isn’t as easily resolvable.’
Neil.
The word slammed into me so hard it knocked the breath out of my lungs.How could he have told them? After everything we’d shared? How could he go from professing his feelings for me in one moment to blowing up my life the next?A sharp, cold ache was zipping through my chest and working its way down to my core.
Because you told him you didn’t feel the same way,my brain whispered.
And like plaster cracking loose from a dilapidated building, I felt myself crumble under the weight of that thought.
‘I don’t have that degree certificate.’ A voice that sounded nothing like mine was saying. ‘Because I didn’t go to NYU.’
‘I’m sorry?’ Swati repeated, her voice losing some of its typical neutrality. I could see it written all over her face: This was turning out to be the weirdest HR intervention in the history of HR interventions.
‘I lied about NYU. I wanted to impress Rajat in my interview and it just slipped out …’ The words came out in a shaky rush.My palms were sweating and my throat was tightening up like someone had wrapped a hand around it. I didn’t know where to look, so I kept my gaze on the floor, blinking aggressively to stop the onslaught of tears that was threatening to spill.
I could feel both of them gawking at me, but neither Varun nor Swati was saying anything. It occurred to me that the bizarre turn this meeting had taken had been as much a shock to them as it had been to me. After what must have been a million years, Swati finally found her voice. ‘This is a grievous breach of trust, Kavya. It puts us in a very difficult position.’
Swati continued talking, but it felt like I had cotton stuffed into my ears.
‘... serious misconduct.’
I didn’t know what was worse—the humiliation, the fear, or the furious, nauseating betrayal burning beneath all of it.
‘Violation of policy …’
Sure, I had rejected Neil. I might have even caused him heartache. But he didn’t retaliate in some petty but ultimately harmlessJab We Metkind of way, like by burning a photograph of me and flushing it down the toilet or calling me up to cuss me out. He’d destroyed the only thing I’d built on my own. My career.
‘Questionable professional integrity …’
I tried to breathe, but my lungs felt like they were on fire.
‘Am I—’ My voice cracked. I cleared my throat and tried again. ‘Am I getting fired?’
