Fuck.
“What’s going on, Camilo?”
I hesitated for a second on how much to say, but I needed help figuring this out, and Patrice was the only one who would tell me exactly what I had to hear. No matter how much I didn’t want to.
“Well I fucked Tom and it was even more amazing than I could’ve ever imagined.” I sighed, reliving the horror of getting caught by a four-year-old. “Then five minutes after we were done, his secret baby and husband showed up at his house!” I slumped on my little love seat, trying not to be too dramatic, but I was having a very hard time regulating my emotions.
Usually I was not the guy calling for advice. I was the one whogaveadvice. Tom had me all over the place. The worst part was I knew I would be back for more. Fucking him had done nothing to slake my thirst for him; it was worse now.
Wayworse.
Patrice’s voice was so steady when he answered, it was like he’d barely registered my revelation of a secret husband and baby.
“Please explain in detail what you mean. Is he actually married, Camilo?”
“No.” I grumbled. “He’s divorced. And it’s not actually a baby, she’s like four. He said he and his ex got divorced when she was still a baby, and now they share custody. The guy didn’t seem jealous or anything, but he did look like he’d dropped by looking for something.” I knew I sounded childish, but I couldn’t help it. “Things were going so well, too. Fuck, I knew this would happen. As soon as I let myself go for it, everything gets complicated. So much for perfect Tom Hughes.”
I could tell Patrice was trying hard not to sound exasperated.
“Camilo, you know better than anyone life is never that simple, especially when it comes to relationships. I also know you wouldn’t want someone perfect, or even near perfect. You’d want someone kind and with his head on straight. Sounds to me like this was just bad timing, and that considering the situation, it went pretty well. Did Tom ask you to leave?”
I pursed my lips at his question, because now we were getting at the fact that I’d acted like a hot mess. “No, he asked me to stay, but I felt weird, so I just went home while Libertad and the ex were still there. He named his kidFreedomin Spanish, Patrice. It’s like the universe hates me.”
Patrice chuckled at my whining. “It sounds like the universe is telling yousomething. Milo, don’t let your doubts cheat you of someone that could be great. Give it a chance. You have a lot of information showing you he’s a good guy. Maybe there’s more to him than you originally thought, but so what? We all have our shit.” He paused then, and when he spoke again, he sounded so serious. “We’re all struggling to figure out how to negotiate whatwe thought were our absolutes with the people life puts in our paths. None of this shit is easy. We at least learnedthatlesson well, Milo.”
I sighed and felt such yearning to have him here. I also wondered if he was talking about himself and Easton. I knew merging those two worlds wouldn’t be easy.
“Are things okay with you and Easton? I’m sorry I haven’t asked, you’ve just been so secretive about it.”
“I’m not ready to talk about it yet.” Patrice’s voice sounded tired but firm, and I knew pushing would get me nowhere.
“Alright, but you know?—”
“I know,Milo, but we were talking about you. So, what are you going to do? Are you going to let a little girl and some ex scare you away?”
I didn’twantto be scared away.
Just as I was about to say so, I heard my phone ping with another call. I pulled it from my ear to look at the screen and saw it was Tom. I let the warmth I felt in my chest make the decision about taking the call for me. Sure, feelings in my body parts had steered me wrong in relationships countless times, but I could stillsmellhim on me. I wasn’t strong enough to close that door yet.
“P, it’s him on the other line.”
“Okay don’t jump down this throat. Let himtalk.”
“Fine! Thanks, friend. I love you.”
“Love you, too.”
I ended the call and picked up the one from Tom. As I said hello, I couldn’t ignore my racing heart or how much I hoped this call would put us back where we’d been an hour ago.
chapter fourteen
tom
“Hi.” There was so much uncertainty in that one word. Camilo’s voice sounded small, so different from the man I’d had in my bed. The one who’d walked into the restaurant this afternoon.
“Camilo. I’m so sorry about earlier. Please believe me, I wasn’t trying to hide anything about Libertad. It’s just I’m cautious, you know? Even if you hadn’t agreed to go out with me, I would have told you about her. But it hadn’t come up and well, I’m sorry.”
He was quiet for a moment and I held my breath hoping his next words weren’t to tell me to go to hell. “I get it. I was just surprised. Things were going so great, and it just all sort of went up in flames.”
