“Well you’ve been holding that card close to your chest, querido. Then again, I can’t remember you ever calling me to tell me about someone. You usually just fall into things and let us know after the fact.” Her tone wasn’t even disapproving, just matter-of-fact. And she was right, in my relationships things happened almost by osmosis. Not Camilo; he demanded my attention at every step. There was no playbook for him, he was like no one else and he wasn’t trying to be.
When my mother spoke again, her tone told me that she knew I was in unknown territory. “I’m happy that you’ve finally met someone you’re willing to do things differently for.”
That was an interesting choice of words and very similar to the lecture I’d gotten from Priya and the guys.
“He isn’t like anyone I’ve ever been with.”
She laughed then and it was that sound that usually came before a loving but firm “I told you so.”
“Well some people come to your life to change it, baby. Just ask that gringo I’ve had on the right side of my bed for forty-two years.”
I shook my head at that and grinned as I answered. “When you’re right, you’re right, Mamí.”
“Of course, I’m right.” The “as always” went unsaid. “So tell me, when can I meet him?”
This time, the throat clearing was legitimate. “Most likely when you come and see the shelter renovation. He’s um, he’s with the agency we decided on.”
“Ay m’ijo, this man must really be something because you never mix business with your personal life. What’s his name?”
“Camilo.” Even I could hear the adoration in my voice.
“Tommy, Tommy, te agarro el Camilo,” she said brimming with humor. “I think you finally got caught, son.”
“I know I did.” There wasn’t a hint of reservation or trepidation in that answer.
chapter twenty-three
camilo
I ended the call with my mom feeling real worry for the first time since she’d started this rough patch with her depression. I was at Tom’s, and it was early afternoon on Christmas Eve. I’d stopped in to hang out with him and Libe before I went to pick up my Mom. We had plans to be at Juanpa’s place for Nochebuena dinner, but when I’d called her to let her know I was heading to her place, she said she wasn’t feeling well and wanted to stay home.
As I sat there thinking about what to do, Tom walked into the living room from putting Libe down for a nap.
“Something wrong with Dinorah?”
I glanced up at him, smiling despite my worry. Tom never resented my checking on my mom, or the time I spent with her. On the contrary, he told me again and again how much he loved how close we were. By now, he also knew me well enough to realize if there was anything amiss.
“My mom isn’t feeling up to going to Juanpa’s for dinner.” I ran my hands over my face, trying to shake off some of the worry. “She was doing so well for the couple weeks after the concert, but since Thanksgiving, she’s been down again. She keeps saying she just needs to rest, but she’s depressed. It’s a real thing and she can’t just snap out of it.” The frustration of watching my mother get worse and worse without being able todo anything for her was starting to get to me. “I wish she wouldseesomeone, but it’s like pulling teeth talking to her about this stuff. I thought we were getting somewhere in October with that group, but she stopped going after two or three sessions.” I closed my eyes and tried to calm down. Going to see my mom while I was upset, too, was not going to help matters.
Tom sat down next to me and just his proximity did a lot to ease my nerves. “Maybe she’d do better with a one-on-one therapist. It’s hard opening up to strangers like that.”
I lifted a shoulder at a loss of what, if anything, could help. “She was the one that said the group would be better, but when it came time to go, she said she couldn’t make the times work with her schedule. She’s so fucking smart and strong, but so stubborn when it comes to admitting she needs help.”
“Sounds like someone I know.” He said it in a teasing tone, which I knew was his way of diffusing the situation.
“Shut up. I ask for help all the time,” I said, grateful for his attempt at humor.
He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me to him. “Next time you do it, take a video so I can see it for myself.” He was such a smartass.
“It’s a good thing you’re hot,” I grumbled, poking him on the chest. “Because you’re not funny.” We both laughed at that for a moment, but it didn’t take long for the worry to seep in again. “Seriously though, I don’t know what to do with her. It’s not good for her to be cooped up in her apartment all the time. I told her we could stay in tonight, but we have to go out and dosomethingfor Christmas.”
Tom widened his eyes and gave me a hopeful smile, like he had just come up with the best idea ever.
“Why don’t you bring her when you come tomorrow? It’ll just be us. Priya and Sanjay will come for a bit, but they’re flying out in the afternoon to visit his parents in Ohio. I would tell you tocome tonight— I’m going to Teevrat and Marc’s—but there will be a lot of people so it might not work if she’s not up for being in a big crowd. I didn’t exactly plan ahead this year, otherwise I would have hosted something myself.”
His tone was casual, but I knew it had nothing to do with him being a bad planner. He usually went to the DR for Christmas with Libe but decided to stay here at the last minute. For me. Tom was here for me, and maybe I could let him help for a change.
“I could suggest that.” The more I thought about it, the more it seemed like a great idea. My mom would love meeting Libe, and it would be nice to have her with me instead of home alone.
