“So what do you want to do today, then?”
“I don’t know. Sleep, cry, and call Wren over and over until she answers?”
“How about we get out of the room? After breakfast, of course.”
“OK,” Arthur said. “Where do you want to go?”
Arthur and his dad stood in front of the Needle. TheFor Salesign in the front yard had a magnet plastered to it that readUnder Contract. Seeing it made his stomach turn.
“She really is a beauty,” his dad said looking up at the big windows, the fresh siding, and especially the damp strips of toilet paper that had all but dissolved all over the lawn and the gutters. “I can see why you fell in love with it.”
“I may have had a bit of a tantrum,” Arthur said, surveying the mess with red-hot embarrassment. Some of it had been picked up by someone, wadded into wet balls and left casually. But most of it was still there. “Mind helping me tidy up?” He held up a couple of trash bags and latex gloves he’d brought along.
“Spoken like a homeowner.”
“I don’t know if we’re keeping it,” Arthur said, handing a bag to his dad and rolling a glove into place on his right hand. “I don’t know anything anymore. But I shouldn’t expect anyone else to clean up my messes.”
Arthur started on the front steps and began gathering what was left of the paper. It was like scraping a stubbornsticker off a dish that had already gone through the dishwasher.
“Tell me what’s going on. Why wouldn’t you hang on to the place?” Neal bent down with some effort, and a loud groan, and joined in.
“It’s a pretty facade, that’s all. Something I thought I wanted but now that I’m here it’s…hollow, somehow. Maybe that’s because there’s literally nothing in there. I’d show you if I could.”
Neal chuckled.
“I had a good childhood, you know? I just wanted to re-create that for my kids. But it was never going to happen, not the way I envisioned it.”
“I hate to see you give up. If you scraped together some money you could still turn this into something special. Have you tried tightening up the budget, cutting back on things you don’t need?” his dad asked. “I know it’s tough, but you have to make sacrifices.”
“You don’t get it, Dad. That’s all wedois make sacrifices. It doesn’t work the way it did when you were starting out.” Arthur sighed. On to the front porch, where he reached out to grab any strips hanging down off the gutters. “But in any case, I might be stuck with it, house poor forever, over my head, trapped in an endless loop of renovations and refinancing and still trying to scrape together enough money to retire one day. It’s like being on the losing end of a game of Monopoly. You just want it to end, but it won’t until you’ve been slowly bled out for everything you’re worth.”
But then Arthur had an idea. Just the tiniest flicker of hope. “If I decide to keep it, will you help me fix it up?”
“I don’t know if I can.”
“I know, I know,” Arthur relented, anticipating his father’s words. “You put in your days of hard work and now you’re enjoying your golden years. And I know you didn’t have anyone helping you. I get it.”
He knew what his old man was going to say. And he couldn’t help but resent it just a little bit, the fact that his dad was so unbothered by the whole world going to shit. Speeding away in their little camper while everything burned in the rearview mirror.
“It’s not just that,” his dad said, a hint of shakiness in his voice. Vulnerability. “I just don’t think I’ll have time. What with me…going back to work.”
“Wait, what?”
“You’re not the only one who’s stuck, son. Now, I know no one’s going to cry me a river, but I’ve been doing the math and unless I die in the next three years, me and your mom are going to be in serious financial trouble.”
“I had no idea.”
“My knees are shot, my back hurts, and I don’t drive so great at night anymore. Our trip has been fun, but it’s also been hell on my body.” Where was this coming from? His father had just been all over the country. Arthur had even seen him take a selfie with a mountain goat. But now that he was really paying attention, he could see how much effort it took the old man to get up off one knee. “But the good news is I don’t plan on dying anytime soon, and sexually, I’m better than ever.”
“I didn’t need to know that part.”
“I’m just saying, the reality is…here we are.”
Another reason his dad wouldn’t be able to help him with the manual labor. It was easy to forget that he was getting old. Same person, same strong personality, but with a few moremiles on him than Arthur often realized. It hit him, for maybe the first time, that his dad would not be around forever.
“Did you already get a job? What is it?”
His father blushed. Honest to God, he turned red from embarrassment. “Driving instructor.”
