I sink both hands into my hair. “So much worse.”
Henry leans forward on his elbows, bitterness still lacing his voice. “Want some advice?”
“Anything.”
“Be honest with her,” he says. “You think you have to protect everyone with your secrets, but hiding things from the people you love, even when you think you have the best intentions…” He leans back in his chair and suddenly looks exhausted. “Let’s just say I know from personal experience how hurtful it is not to be trusted.”
“Henry—”
“Don’t apologize. I know this is a you thing and not about me. But Gracie hasn’t had years to adjust to your bullshit. She won’t understand, and your secretswillhurt her if they haven’t already. So… just be honest. As honest as you can.”
He told me not to apologize, but all the years of keeping him in the dark are pressing down against me like the heel of a boot. I want to tell him how close I came to telling her everything—about Larkwood, my past, and my present. But in the end, I couldn’t. Just like I’ve never been able to tell him.
“Okay,” I say, throat constricted. “I promise to try, and I am sorry. For everything.”
He nods, and if he has anything more to say on the subject, I don’t find out, because at that moment, our server comes back with our main courses.
“Were the zucchini blossoms not to your liking?” he asks, looking at the nearly full plate.
Henry gives him a tight smile. “They were great. But my poor friend here is too lovesick to eat a thing.”
Our server gives me a sympathetic look. “We’re all waiting forthatvaccine. Can I get you another drink?”
“Make it two,” Henry says, and I’m so filled with gratitude for his willingness to sit with me—to somehow forge a way past this—that I hardly register his next muttered words. “I think I need one more than he does.”
35GRACIE
Wedding Day
This morning, when my eyes snapped open two hours before my alarm, I knew there was no point trying to go back to sleep. I got up carefully, trying not to disturb Jude, who showed up last night with pizza, wine, and a deeply appreciated “How can I help?”
After letting me read my entire coordination schedule to him (twice), he forced me to relax and get some sleep. Eventually. But now that Wedding Day has cometh, I’ve had the energy and hyperfocus of an overcaffeinated bomb squad all day.
I take a breath, glancing at the grandfather clock behind the milling wedding party to make sure we’re still on schedule. Somehow, despite having to work within this ridiculously short time frame, everything I’ve planned has gone off without a hitch today.
Well, almost everything.
Checking to make sure that Phoebe is still distributing bouquets and that none of Brooke’s bridesmaids are sneaking shots or trying to leap off the furniture, I pull out my phone.
Gracie:Please let me know when you have the cake and you’re on your way back.
Jude:That’s the third way you’ve phrased the same request in under 10 minutes. Impressive.
Gracie:JUDE.
Jude:I will let you know when the cake is secured. Unclench your jaw.
I note with annoyance that my jaw is, in fact, clenched and make an effort to relax it. This morning, when Valerie told me there had been a family emergency and no one was available to deliver the cake, I was on the verge of panic. But then a pair of large, warm hands were smoothing my shoulders down my back.I’ll take care of it, he’d said against my neck. Exhaling, my jaw loosens, and my phone vibrates.
Jude:See? Isn’t that better?
I shake my head, a reluctant smile tugging at my lips.
Gracie:Good to know you’re not beyond planting a Nanny Cam, perv.
Jude:I would never.
Gracie:Sure. Just tell me which potted plant I should flash.
