Chapter Sixteen
In the solar at Bearach Castle, sunlight beamed in the narrow window beside Kristina where she and Anna sat on the window seat. She was thrilled to use her returning vision to see her sister's beautiful face for the first time in over two years. Although Anna was still blurry, Kristina could see her blond curls, her rosy cheeks and the green color of her eyes.
"Oh Anna, you look wonderful." Tears filled Kristina's eyes. "You look so happy and healthy now." Two years ago, Anna had been gaunt and pale from loss of blood, and her eyes had been haunted with grief and fear.
Anna smiled. "With good reason. Neacal brings me great joy. And my body has healed from all the abuse and injuries Blackburn tortured me with years ago."
"I'm so pleased for you." Tears flowing from her eyes, Kristina embraced her sister.
"When are you going to allow me to tell Neacal you can see?"
"Soon. I but wish to make certain 'tis lasting." Kristina feared Neacal would send a missive to Colin telling him. She wanted to muster up the courage to tell him herself.
After Anna pulled back, Kristina said, "I want to see what you look like, too, Maili." Although she could see a dim impression of Maili, she wanted to view her closer in the slice of rare, bright sunlight beaming in from the southwest. When the two switched places, she realized Maili's hair could not be more different from Anna's.
"Your hair is so dark and lovely." The sunlight gleamed off her thick, silky brownish-black hair.
Her friend smiled. "I thank you."
"And your eyes are pale blue. You look just as impish as I'd imagined."
Maili laughed. "Sometimes Shamus tells me I look like one of the faerie."
"Aye, you do indeed. Would one of you bring me your silver mirror? I would like to see my own face."
Maili's grin fell as she turned to Anna. Kristina could easily feel the increase in tension from the two women.
Anna hesitated. "Are you certain you're ready to see the scar?"
Kristina nodded. "I ken 'tis a bad scar. But I must learn to accept the sight of it, whether I like it or not. To pretend it doesn't exist is but lying to myself. You know how important honesty is to me, as well as facing reality."
"Aye, 'tis true."
"I will go and get my small hand mirror, if you think 'tis all right," Maili said.
Anna nodded. Once their friend had left the room, Anna said, "Truth be told, your scar is not so bad. It is minor compared to Neacal's. So please don't overreact or become melancholy about it."
Kristina shrugged, trying to pretend she was not fearful and anxious about seeing what she looked like after such an injury. "Do not worry over me, sister. I'm stronger than you realize."
"I ken you are very strong. Also, remember that Colin loves you just the way you are, flaws and all."
Kristina wished Anna wouldn't bring up Colin. 'Twas hard enough living day to day without him. But now that her fondest wish was coming true—her sight returning—naturally she would be concerned about what Colin and everyone saw when they looked at her.
Her life was on the precipice of changing completely for the better. If Colin truly did love her, she must somehow grow used to the fact he loved her even if one side of her face was ugly. She must accept it and convince herself it was true.
After Maili returned and closed the door, she placed the small silver mirror into Kristina's hand. At first, Kristina was afraid to look into it. She closed her eyes and held the mirror to her chest. She prayed she would be able to accept the way she looked and not be too discouraged over it. She dried her tears on her sleeve, opened her eyes and slowly lifted the mirror.
First, she looked at the undamaged part of her face. Although it was still a bit blurry, she viewed her blue eyes and her blond hair and brows, her fair smooth skin. In the past, people had often called her bonny, but she had always thought Anna prettier. This side of her face looked much the way she remembered. Still, it was strange to look at herself after such a length of time.
Without thinking, she turned her head, bringing the other side of her face into view. At first, she was startled by the wide and jagged pinkish-rose line that ran down her cheek. She held her breath as she examined it in as much detail as possible, given her blurred vision. Trails of small dot scars and short lines—where the healer had stitched up the cut more than two years ago—ran down either side of the main scar.
"See? 'Tis not so bad," Anna said in an overly optimistic tone, which only annoyed Kristina.
"If 'twas on your face, you would not be so cheerful."
Anna's smile vanished and annoyance flashed in her eyes. "Kristina," she admonished. "You do not have to be so cynical. I would much rather have a scar on my face than to have lost my beloved child."
Kristina felt the impact of her sister's words like a punch to the chest. 'Twas true, Anna had suffered far worse when she'd had the miscarriage after Blackburn had pushed her down the stairs.
