Page 63 of The Way We Swing

“I like dudes, not girls,” I said, trying to keep my eyes ahead.

My dad’s mouth fell open, and his head tilted. He looked like he almost understood but wasn’t completely sure what I meant.

I looked at Mom, and she seemed to be almost laughing. “Of course, you do, Tanner. I’m glad you told us.”

“You knew?” I said, slipping into a chair.

“Well, yeah,” she said.

“How?”

“I just did,” she said, glancing toward one of the other three boys in the room.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Dad said.

I looked up, trying to gauge a reaction but unable to.

“Didn’t seem relevant,” Mom shrugged.

“How will we have grandkids?” Dad asked.

Mom jumped out of her chair and grabbed a towel from the counter. She snapped the towel at his arm, crumbs of food flying through the air. “Don’t you say that! Apologize to your son!”

Dad’s arms flew to protect himself. Zach and Gavin roared with laughter in the background, happy that, for once, they weren’t the object of Mom’s yelling.

“I just meant he isn’t going to have any biological kids,” Dad said, still trying to protect himself.

“Not true. There are surrogates, among other things,” she said, sending the towel once more at Dad.

“Well, at least he’s not going to come home and tell us he got a chick pregnant.”

“Jesus, Scott,” Mom said, throwing her arms up into the air.

“I’ll shut up now,” Dad said.

“That’s for the best,” Mom said, turning around to face me again. “We both still love you, Tanner, no matter how many times your dad sticks his foot in his mouth. We do need to talk, though. You still need to wear condoms, even if, as your father put it, ‘You can’t get a chick pregnant.’”

“Moooom,” Gavin said, expressing my thoughts exactly. I put my face in my hands, the heat coming off my cheeks vibrating against them.

“Just make sure you’re staying safe. Your dad and I are going to have to decide whether we’re comfortable with you sleeping in the same room whenever Easton or Ricky sleep at the house.”

“Mom, stop,” I said. “Now.”

“Easton’s not gay, Mom; he’s told us a bunch of times,” Gavin giggled.

I shot him a look that said, 'shut the hell up.' Easton stared at the floor, blushing as hard as I was. I turned backto Mom, who had the same hidden smile on her face as when we had started the conversation.

“When did you tell your brothers?”

“He told me on our baseball trip,” Zach said. “Gavin found out on Christmas when—”

“While we played cards after everyone else went to bed,” I cut in. I doubted he’d say Gavin had walked in on us, but I still wasn’t letting him finish that sentence. “This conversation is over,” I added, grabbing both of my brothers, who made no effort to contain their amusement. “Come with us,” I said as I passed Easton.

“We’ll finish this later, Tanner,” Mom’s voice echoed at my back.

I pushed them into the basement and shut the door behind us before taking the steps two at a time.

Gavin and Zach lay on the couches; Easton stood near the loveseat, looking as heated as I felt.