Page 93 of Dangerous Promises

"Then maybe that's enough," Isla says, turning back towards the pool. She sits quietly next to me and together we stay in comfortable silence, watching as the day goes by. The sun warms my face, bringing with it a sense of peace.

I accept now that it was Victor's time. I will always wish there was more I could've done to help him, but there wasn't. So while I don't forgive myself, I do understand now. Even more so, Iunderstand that this feeling isn't ever going to go away no matter what I do to block it.

The only thing I can do now is live with it. And move on.

So I do.

Chapter

Thirty-Nine

Sage

Over the next few days, Freddie gives me a whole heap of shit when he catches Alexei trying to sneak out of my room. And then subsequently off the property. In fact, the next five times Alexei is here, he gets caught coming out of my room at odd hours of the night.

To me, it is a luxury. For every time we finish the good part, the even better part comes. He sits with me, strokes my hair until I fall asleep and he never runs. The dreamless deep sleep that I slip into when he's next to me is a blessing in more ways than one. Knowing that each time I close my eyes he will still be here in the morning.

The way Alexei wants me never makes me feel insecure, only powerful.

Now, only a day has passed since he last left my bed. Yet doing it again is the only thing on my mind. Though seeking him out is my newest obsession, so too is the spiral of shame that accompanies it.

A barb stings into my heart every time I think about how wrong it is to let him touch me. Every time I seek him out hoping he will, and every time we are only caught by someone who is willing to look the other way.

Whether we like it or not, the things we do together are a betrayal. Not only to our promises to our respective families, but to our promise to each other. The promise made in black roses that I would be the one to kill Alexei Rushkoff or him me.

And no, he can't kill me with his dick, but he's sure giving it a try.

My focus should be on Chet. If I let myself get distracted from Chet then I will lose more than I already have. That's a betrayal to Nicholas's memory, and to this family, in itself.

I see the other complication in the flesh now.

Dad is standing outside on the balcony talking to Anton, for the first time in a while looking like they're not shouting. Getting to Chet was going to be hard enough without Dad deciding that we don't need to work with the Rushkoffs to do so.

Not only do I have to figure out how I'm going to kill Chet, I have to figure out how to get my father to let the Rushkoffs help me do it. It's all up to me. Alexei seems to think I have the brain power to mastermind a way to achieve both of those things.

I open the balcony door and slide out to join them, smiling awkwardly when they both look at me like I'm interrupting their business again.

"Sage," Dad says, avoiding my eye contact. He's been quieter since I showed him the necklace. Not quiet in the way that he's coming around and is going to listen. It's a way I can't decipher because I've never seen it from him before.

"I suppose you've come out here to talk me into working with the Rushkoffs, too," Dad sighs, neglecting his cane as he leans casually up against the balcony rail.

"I wasn't going to, but I can give it a crack if you like," I say.

He shakes his head, ignoring me and turning back to my uncle. "I'm healing now, you know. Soon it won't be your decision, Anton."

"Which is why I'm trying to convince you to do the right thing," Anton replies, looking solemn with his hands in his pockets.

Dad scoffs. "It wasn't the right thing to do when I was in charge."

Anton gives Dad a look and even though their voices remain even, there's no less hostility between them than when they were shouting.

"I know. I know what you'll say," Dad says. "That things have changed. But none of you can tell me exactly how or why."

I look to Anton for the answer just as Dad does, but he doesn't flinch, saying nothing and not making a move to. He knows I'm the reason things have changed. Things have changed around me and the choices I made. They have all adapted to the chaos I created with every ridiculous action that I've taken.

I'm the only one that can explain that to Dad. I both begrudge them and am grateful to them for the unspoken notion that I have to be the one to tell him that.

"You drove us right into the ground, little brother," Dad says, choking up as he shifts uncomfortably to rest his hands against the banister and look out onto the pool.