She huffs a laugh. ‘When have you ever asked before?’
‘Are you sad?’
A beat. ‘Right now?’
‘No, like generally.’
‘No.’
I change to the bottom bow. ‘Would you tell me if you were?’
It comes out as a whisper, ‘No.’
As she turns around, I take her by the shoulders so she has no choice but to look me dead in the eyes. ‘I want you to hear me when I say this. You’re beautiful, Juliet Evangeline Butler.’
She rolls her eyes and tries to shake me off. ‘Cheers.’
I don’t budge. ‘You’re beautiful.’
Her eyes cool. ‘You just said that.’
‘You’re not listening. You’re beautiful.’
‘Enough.’
‘You’re beautiful.’
‘Stop it!’
‘You’re beautiful.’
It happens without warning. Her eyes fill and spill over in a heartbeat, and her hands clamp over them.
What have I done?
I wrap my arms around her and hold her tight against my chest. Watching Jules cry rattles me to the core. It’s the saddest thing I’ve ever seen. She’s always so together, so capable, so mesmerising, and now she looks like a broken little girl.
I start when she bursts from my grip. ‘What the fuck are you doing?’
‘Nothing! I’m trying to compliment you, Jules. Is that so bad? I want you to see how incredible you are.’
‘Stop it! I’m not some lost puppy who needs taken care of.’ She shoves tears away but they keep coming in a torrent. ‘I built an empire and I didn’t need some man-child telling me I look pretty to do it.’
I’ll shelveman-childfor later. Now’s not the time. ‘That’s not what I’m saying at all. You therapised me so now it’s my turn to therapise you. You quantify your value – money, likes, calories. That’s not life! No one’s lying on their death bed agonising over how much REM sleep they had. But that’s ok! You don’t see yourself clearly, but I do. You’re worth so much more?—’
She stamps her foot. ‘You don’t know me!’
‘I know enough.’
‘You don’t get to judge me. You’re not my boyfriend. Piss off.’
I wasn’t planning on having this out in wet swim shorts but it looks like we’re doing it anyway. ‘Why not?’
She flinches. ‘Why would you even want to be?’
‘Because I think we’re really good together.’ And I really, really,reallyfucking like you, but I think she got it with the whole compliment thing. Don’t need to fall on my ass twice in the space of a minute.
‘I disagree.’
