“God, I missed you guys,” I mumble, wrapping my arms around Amy and Charlie. “I’m so glad you’re here.”
I’ve spent all morning thinking about them and the friendship we formed after I met Charlie on the SeaStar. I never had many girlfriends growing up—at least not close ones—outside of my sisters. But they are ten years younger than me.
Making friends in your twenties is a Herculean feat. Most people have friends from high school or college, but if you’re not one of those fortunate people, it can be isolating. I didn’t realize how lonely I was until I met them. Add in Vivian, Mateo, Oliver, and Jett, and I have more friends than I do fingers on one hand.
That was not the case a year ago.
“I can’t believe we’re here,” Amy mutters. “Or that Charlie survived those plane rides.”
Charlie pipes up. “My therapist prescribed a heavy relaxant, and Mateo held my hand until I fell asleep. It was worth it for this. The first-class seat helped.”
“First class?” I ask. “I didn’t buy you first-class tickets.”
She doesn’t need to tell me who made that change. I peer over my shoulder to where Jett’s embracing Mateo in an enthusiastic hug. My chest tightens when he smiles, and I rip my gaze away. “I should have known,” I mutter.
Amy and Charlie release me, their bags stacked in the hotel lobby in Cairns. The air-conditioning is wonderful compared to the heat outside, and after a morning of driving through farmland and forest to get here, I’m excited to catch up with my friends.
I haven’t decided whether I’m going to tell them about my small problem regarding Jett and the space he’s carved out in my heart. I need to decide for myself how to handle it. Amy and Charlie will only act like an angel and devil on each shoulder, giving advice that muddles my brain until I do something stupid.
“Catch up later?” I ask when they both stifle a yawn. “I need to get some work done.”
They agree, and I check into the rooms, passing out key cards to the group. Everyone disperses—Charlie and Mateo to one room, Amy and Oliver to their own. I leave the keys for Doug and Molly at the front desk with the hotel employee, and then it’s Jett and me.
My poor wording this morning still haunts me, as does the hurt he tried to hide when he misunderstood what I was trying to say. The cassowary disrupted my apology, but the guilt still lingers hours later. I hand over his room key, nerves churning in my belly.
“I’m sorry about this morning.”
He carries our bags to the elevator. “I know,” he sighs. “You hit a soft spot. I struggled in high school, and I dropped out of college. Sometimes those insecurities rise to the surface.”
I never thought Jett would be self-conscious about those things. He’s one of the most successful people I’ve ever met, and he’s done it all on his own. Built his channel from the ground up with passion and kindness. The level of success he has would turn anybody else into a different person.
“Graduating from college doesn’t automatically make you intelligent,” I say, stepping into the small space. The air is suffocating this close to him. “I’ve witnessed your work ethic these last two weeks, and you are incredibly talented at what you do. I got a glimpse into that on the research vessel, but when you run the show, your passionshines.”
I don’t add that it’s his passion that draws me to him like a moth to a flame. I know it could burn me, getting too close, but I’m finding it harder to resist the pull. His hand grazes mine, the both of us facing forward.
Butterflies flutter up my chest, causing my throat to tighten. The touch lingers until the doors slide open. He carries my bag to my hotel door, dropping it beside me when I reach thethreshold. The lock beeps and the door unlatches, but as I step inside, he catches my wrist.
“What you said,” he croaks, his voice thick, “it means a lot to me.”
He rolls his lips together, the movement pulling my traitorous gaze down. The corner of his smile twitches, and it zaps awareness over my skin. Fingers tighten on my wrist, almost imperceptibly, before he releases me.
“It’s only the truth. You have a true talent with all of this.”
“Thanks.” He taps the doorframe. “See you later.”
Even if we didn’t have plans with our friends, I would have found a way back to him somehow, using some excuse about filming or logistics to spend time with him.
He lifts his duffel over his shoulder, spinning on his heel. The door falls shut, and he disappears from the peephole, my heart lodged in my throat. Flutters build in my chest, a bait ball swimming faster and tighter until the emotion overwhelms me and I fall onto the bed and scream into the pillow.
How do you fix something when the person you want is the problem and the solution?
Upbeat rock music rattles through the Irish pub, which is crowded with backpackers and other tourists enjoying the live band. Amy loops an arm through mine, weaving us through the horde to the back of the bar, farthest from the stage.
“You look hot as fuck,” she says, eyes zipping along the seams of my low-cut black dress. “Heads are turning, babe.”
It only took an hour of staring at my luggage before I worked up the courage to slip on the dress Jett chose, the lace hem brushing against my mid-thigh.
A blush creeps up my neck, heating my skin. I tuck a curl behind my ear. “No they’re not.”
