Chapter Twenty-two
The cottage on theHawksmere estate was just as it had always been, though it had been repaired and painted, and Serenity could tell that someone from the main house must come and take care of it frequently.
She’d stopped at the mansion when she’d arrived, to tell them she was taking up residence there, and had been met with no resistance. The mansion Luke had built was everything she’d expected it to be, and she’d stood in the grand entryway, feeling very much a servant and remembering all her silly girlhood dreams of one day being his countess. Then she’d squared her shoulders, knowing she’d managed to secure a life that was much more than someone of her station could have ever expected, and retreated to the cottage.
Several days after she’d arrived, Serenity took the teapot off the stove with a sigh and poured herself a cup, glancing out the window as she heard a coach coming up the drive. She froze, suddenly thrust back to the last time she’d seen that coach, the day her life had been torn irrevocably apart. The tea splashed over the rim of the cup, burning her fingers and yanking her back to the present.
She bit her lip and cleaned up the spilled tea. She’d known he would come for her, but the days she’d spent apart from him had helped clarify things. She would be strong. She would tell him in no uncertain terms she was done with this. She couldn’t be his mistress, wouldn’t come back to London with him. Nothing he could say would sway her.
A few moments later, a loud knock sounded on the door. Swallowing and straightening her shoulders, she went to answer it, deciding that she wouldn’t even invite him in. She would say what she had to say with him standing on the front steps.
Despite her determination to not give into him, she couldn’t help but gaze hungrily at him once she’d opened the door. They just stood there, staring at each other for a long moment.
“Why are you here?” she asked at last, proud of the coldness she’d managed to insert in her tone.
He took a step back, his blue eyes registering a flash of pain. “Aren’t you going to invite me in?”
She shook her head, crossing her arms. “No, Luke, I’m sorry. I just can’t. Please, say what you have to say and then leave.”
He frowned, but then a look of determination every bit as strong as her own crossed his face. “All right, if that’s how you want me to do it.”
She nodded jerkily, even though her resolve was weakening. She loved him so much. Every time she looked at him, all she wanted was to be with him. No matter what the cost to her heart and soul. If he told her he loved her, if he asked her to come back with him, she didn’t know how she’d resist.
Taking a deep breath, he lifted his gaze to hers. “I have done everything wrong, and I’ve come here today to try and make it right.”
She lifted one brow suspiciously, afraid to speak.
He cleared his throat. “I love you, Serenity. I have loved you since the very first time we met, at the ruins, when you offered me comfort. All my life, you’ve been the only one who ever allowed me to be weak, the only one who ever saw that I didn’t have all the answers. You’ve seen all my weaknesses, and you loved me anyway.”
Her resolve was already crumbling. “You are the strongest man I know. I am so glad that you have allowed me to see parts of you that you don’t show anyone else.”
A small smile curved his lips. “You say that like I had a choice. Like I could have kept from stripping myself bare for you.”
“I love you, too,” she whispered brokenly, cursing herself for her lack of strength where he was concerned. “I want you to know that despite how things ended, it was never a question of me not loving you.”
“Nothing has ended,” he said, his voice rising in frustration. “I know I’ve been an idiot, I know I handled everything wrong, but there is still hope for us. I refuse to believe that we can’t still find happiness.”
“How?” she cried. “I can’t be your mistress, Luke!”
He shook his head incredulously, his eyes full of shock. “Is that what you think? That I’ve come here to ask you to be my mistress?”
