Jane squared her shoulders, determined to resist him. “That was a long time ago. You’re a stranger to me now.”
“Then get to know me again,” he pleaded, his heart in his eyes. “Let me court you, Jane.”
Court me?
For a moment, the whole world seemed to shift, to expand.Dear God.This was what she’d always wanted. To marry Julian and bear his children. To make a home for him and soothe away his demons. “You can’t be serious.”
“Oh, I am,” he assured her. “What must I do to prove it to you?”
“I don’t know,” she whispered, turning away. Once more, her gaze fell on the portrait of Julian’s family. She seized upon it, needing to change the subject. “Do you ever speak to Ethan?”
“No. He left the country the moment he graduated from Cambridge. He was chasing after orchids in the jungles of South America, last I heard.”
The hint of wistfulness in his voice surprised her. He blamed his younger brother for the accident that had taken the lives of his older brother and little sister, or at least he once had.
She turned to look at him, trying to see past the hooded wariness in his dark eyes. “Do you still hate him for what happened?”
Julian sighed. “Of course not. He was just a child when Elizabeth and Nathaniel died. And he wasn’t the only one who went skating despite Father’s warnings.”
“Oh, Julian,” she whispered. “You should write him a letter. Let him know. I’m sure he’d like to mend the rift between you.”
“Maybe you’re right. In fact, a friend of his asked me to do exactly that just a few days ago. But I don’t know what to say after all these years.” Julian closed his eyes, and the stark sadness on his chiseled features made her regret raising the topic. She’d never meant to hurt him.
“You’ll find the words. Just do it soon, or you’ll regret it forever.” As she spoke, she stepped into his arms. She couldn’t help herself.
Julian inhaled sharply and pulled her against him, burying his face in her hair. “You realize you’re one of the only people I know who even remembers I have a brother?” He cupped her face and lifted her head, staring at her with such hungry intensity it took her breath away. “You know me better than anyone else in the world. How can you pretend otherwise?”
Confused, terrified of her own conflicting emotions, she stepped out of his grasp. “Wewerefriends, Julian. But that was a long time ago. And I’m sorry, but I can’t trust you. I can’t let you hurt me again.”
Desperate to escape—before she listened to her heart and agreed to this foolishness—she hurried down the hall toward the cozy little sitting room where they’d left Emma and Michael.
“Jane. Don’t go. There’s so much more I want to say to you...” Julian’s swift steps echoed behind her.
She increased her pace, afraid to stop, afraid to spend even one more moment alone with him. When she finally reached the sitting room, she threw the door open without knocking.
She realized her mistake a second too late.
Emma and Michael lay tangled together on the sofa, engaged in an act of startling intimacy. Michael’s mouth was on Emma’s bare breast, and his hand was buried beneath her skirt. Emma’s eyes were closed, a look of pure bliss on her face.
Jane drew in a startled breath but couldn’t force herself to look away. She’d never seen anything so shocking. Yet the intimately entwined couple had a strange beauty she found all too compelling.
Longing knifed through her. The innocent passion she’d shared with Julian a decade ago had never led to this. Never... except in her lonely, aching dreams. How many times had she fantasized about their passion, wishing she’d let Julian take her innocence, since now it seemed no one ever would?
Julian came to an abrupt halt at her side. Heat suffused her face. She turned to leave, trying to push him out of the room before her.
He tore his gaze away from their friends and gave her a questioning glance. A choked laugh escaped him when he saw the look on her face.
She elbowed him in the stomach, cutting off the sound. But it was too late.
Michael lifted his head, and the mortification in his eyes eclipsed her own embarrassment. “Oh, God,” Michael moaned. He scrambled to shield Emma from view.
“I’m sorry,” Jane whispered, backing away. “I’m so sorry.”
Julian cleared his throat, and she knew he was doing his best to hold back even more laughter. “We’ll just wait out here until you’re through.”
Shutting the door firmly behind him, he shook his head and leaned against the wall, his dark eyes bright with amusement. “What were you thinking, Jane? You expected to find them having tea and discussing China patterns?”
“I don’t know.” She pressed her hands against her hot cheeks, humiliated. “I will never be able to look Emma in the eyes again.”
