Page 67 of Every Almost

"If it's about the phrase?—"

"It's about soul matches."

Reyna stared at him, noticing he wasn't smiling. In fact, he looked at her like a man who had something real to say, wanting to ensure she heard it properly.

"A soul match?" Reyna started. "Jere, is everything okay?"

Jere nodded, then put his hand on her knee, patting it lightly. "Everything's fine," he assured her. "It's just somethingwe haven't yet talked about and, it's actually a big deal for the Qorrathi. Every one of us is born with one - a soul match."

"Okay. So, I shouldn't be worried? I have to admit, your seriousness is throwing me off a bit."

Jere actually had the decency to chuckle at that, and it made Reyna feel a bit more relaxed about whatever this conversation was amping up to be. Less anxious, if not settled.

"Everything really is okay, Rey. I promise."

"Well, if you promise..." Reyna smiled and Jere returned it, pulling his hand from her knee.

"It's just very important, but also very private. We don't talk about it, at least, not until it happens."

"Has it happened for you?"

Jere took a big breath. "No."

Reyna studied him, realizing there was more he wasn't saying. But she was going to allow him the space to tell her at his own speed. Considering how private and serious Jere was being for the first time ever, she wanted to respect every part of this conversation.

"A soul match is someone whose biological signature is compatible with your own. But it is at a level so deep that when you meet them, your body knows before your brain can even register there's another person in the room." Reyna's eyes went wide at this information. She wondered what that would be like, being so sure of something so important because of a biological reaction you can't control. That either sounded like the best way to ensure you found true love, or the worst kind of prison. Reyna wasn't sure which one sounded more correct.

"It's not attraction, but I mean, that's obviously part of it. It's not love at first sight either, though, because it's a form of love so pure and so absolute there is no argument. The soul match is just the act of recognition itself. Your body knows what to do with the recognition and almost... runs away with it."

Jere turned away from her then, putting his hands up on the counter and staring at them. Reyna could almost see him thinking through his next words.

"Your biological cells recognize theirs, your nervous system locks on, and once it activates, there's no stopping it, or reversing it, or avoiding it. It's not a choice, not in the least. And it's definitely not a feeling you can just manage or reason your way out of." He looked back up at Reyna. "It's as involuntary as your heart beating."

Reyna looked him over. "You didn't say what happens if you resist it."

"You can't. I mean, not really. Trust me, there have been Qorrathi who've tried to, but they've gone on to describe it as pain. Actual, physical pain, where your body rejects the distance between you and that person like poison or venom. Sure, youcanendure it, technically. But eventually, biology wins." He paused again, returning his gaze to his hands "It always wins."

Reyna went quiet. She watched him, watched as his gaze didn't return to hers, watched as he kept staring at his hands, watched as his face remained rigid, as if trying to cover his emotions. She turned away from him then, swinging her legs back under the counter, and turned her drink in her hands.

"You thought it might be me," she said quietly.

She could feel Jere look over at her. She turned to look at him, his expression the one she had seen exactly once before, the night in the Novahall corridor when she sat with him while he grieved creatures small enough to fit in his hand. This was Jere at his most honest at the most basic level.

"I did," he said. "For a while, actually. Quite a long while, if I'm being honest. You and Elena became the closest people to me, in my whole life, even beyond my family. And you know I love my family." He smiled then, and she returned it as she studied him as he spoke. "But there has always been somethingabout you, Rey. You've always been the one I'd go to first, the one I'd miss most when we're apart." He paused, turning to fully face her again, so she matched him in her chair. "I honestly just kept waiting for the activation, Rey. I felt like I was living in a weird form of limbo, just waiting and checking, every time we were brought together again. When I first came onto the Emberkind, after every mission to Earth." Then he looked right at her." I was almost counting on it, Rey. I think, some part of me wanted it to be you. Because you mean the world to me."

This was the first time Jere had been so honest about how he felt about Reyna, but she believed him, without any doubt. And the truth was, he meant the same to her. She'd never said it to him, and she regretted that now.

"The mean the world to me, too, Jere," she said, grabbing his hand. He still looked at her, gentle and warm and loving, but almost pained in a way, too. And Reyna knew what it meant.

"But..." she led, with a smile. He dropped his gaze from hers and smiled, his true, big, Jere grin that she knew and loved.

"But..." he started. "The signal never came," he said with a shrug of his shoulders. "And I realized it's always been because, well Reyna, I hate to say it but, you're just not my match." Reyna actually giggled at his mock seriousness, almost as though he was delivering a breakup speech. But the humor lining his words made it impossible to take seriously.

"Oh no!" Reyna shrieked, her other hand flying to her forehead in a move of drama for the masses. "How will I ever live with myself, Jerel?!"

At this, Jere let out a hefty belly laugh, and Reyna joined in. But as it died down, Jere got serious again. This time, it was a quiet, filled with love.

"You're not my match, Rey, because you're my sister. My heart, my blood, myfamily. And those are very different things. Both good, amazing in their own right, and purposeful in life inall the ways relationships like those can be. But still different. And it just took me a while to understand that the difference wasn't alackof you being important in my life. It was the answer."