“Yes. Of course. But that alone would never have been enough. I agreed because I thought this experience might help bring us back together.That’swhy I did it.”
Her eyes grow very wide. “What?”
“It was always only about you. What I want isyou. If I had you… Fuck, I’d be happy doing anything Ferraro wanted me to.”
That fucking guilt flickers again on the edges of her expression. She stands by the bookshelf just staring at me. “You’re really not upset we blew it?” she asks eventually.
“Not at all.”
She places her hand on one of the shelves, but her eyes don’t stray from me. “I just…find that hard to believe.”
I rake my fingers through my hair. “My God, you still don’t get it, do you? Isn’t it fucking obvious by now?”
“What are you talking about?”
I walk up to her and cage her in with my arms. “I told you I wouldn’t lie to you anymore after we got to New York. I stuck to that promise. But there’s something I’ve been holding back. And isn’t that just as bad? I don’t want to play these games anymore.”
She tips her head back against the shelves. “What are you talking about?”
“I fucking love you.”
Her lips part on a harsh breath. She stares at me with her glistening blue eyes for a long moment, as if she’s trying to see into the very depths of my soul, and then she ducks under my arm and flees down the hallway to her room.
No. I’m not going to let her run away from me.
She tries to close the bedroom door, but I fling it open. She moves inside, but I catch her, grabbing her by the waist and pulling her against my chest. She struggles for a moment before she grows still.
I press my lips to her ear and whisper, “I’m in love with you. And I know you’re not sure if you feel the same way about me because I’m not the kind of man you ever imagined yourself with.”
Her chest rises and falls with heavy breaths.
“But, Sunshine, the more I see you fight the feelings that are trying to burst out of you, the more determined I become. I will wait for you for however long it takes. I’d rather face your scornful looks and your righteous anger than exist in a world where you’re notmine.”
I turn her around and hold her by the arms. “It’s torture to have you so close to me yet so far. It’s torture to remember how we were. When I think back to our days in Darkwater Hollow, the pain I feel is visceral. It’s worse than the pain of being in that ring with Alessio. I’d let him wreck me again and again if it meant I’d have a hope of getting us back.”
A whimper comes out of Blake. The sound is devastating. “It’s never going to be like it was. Not here.”
“Believe me, I know. But I also know that as long as my heart beats, I’m going to keep trying to find a path back to you. Back tous.”
Her shining eyes pierce through me as she sobs.
I press my forehead to hers. “You’re it for me. You are my first love. And you are my last.”
She makes a choked gasp and shoves at my chest. “Damn you, Nero.”
And then she crushes her lips to mine.
CHAPTER 25
BLAKE
The kiss is an explosion. A supernova. The energy released pours into my veins and takes up residence, setting my body aflame.
Our plan is ruined. There’s no way out for me anymore. No hope of leaving. The idea that I’m stuck in this world forever should devastate me.
Instead, I feel a deep sense of relief I hadn’t felt since we arrived in New York.
It’s almost better that the choice has been taken from me. It saves me from the agony of trying to decide between what I want and what’s “right.”
