Page 53 of Endless Depths

Cole

In the wheelhouse,there’s a wooden beam over the windows with photos of fallen captains and crew pinned onto it, fluttering like angels when the wind blows through. It’s a reminder of our heritage, a warning of the ocean’s ire.

My grandpa’s up there, my mom and uncle too. Seb hung up Dad’s picture while I watched, and now I’ll hang up his alone.

I pull a photo from my back pocket. In the picture, Seb sits in the captain’s chair with Finn perched on his lap. They’re both smiling joyously, pointing through the window at something. Maybe a whale or a rainbow. I don’t know.

Memories echo in the silence—Seb calming my panic with a single look that saidtrust meafter Dad threw me overboard, then taking my hand and helping me swim to the surface, that same hand holding mine and promising he’d keep me safe the night Dad tore apart the kitchen in search of a bottle he already drank, that same hand holding mine when he promised to take care of me while I was dying.

And now he’s not here.

I’ve lost the only father figure I ever had. He took care of me nine months out of the year while Dad fished, plus the other three months because when Dad was home, his mind was still at sea.

Tears prick my eyes as I reach up and pin Seb’s photo into the wood. Pain pierces me so viscerally, the thumbtack might as well be a blade. It hurts more than crushing my pelvis did, more than struggling to breathe with all those broken ribs, more than the pain that has plagued me every day since.

I collapse into the captain’s seat and bury my face in my hands. When I lift my head, the sight of Seb and Finn up there next to Dad makes me want to rip all the photos down, light a fire on the deck, and go down with the ship.

But I can’t do that. The crew depends on me. Fishing is their livelihood. What we make will keep them afloat for the rest of the year. Lawrence has a criminal record. Javi’s paramedic gig is only part time. Alejo supports his family back home. I don’t know what Wes spends his money on.

TheBriaris Finn’s legacy, the one Seb would have passed on to him. The weight of all that responsibility bears down on me. Thank god Morgan is coming.

Exhaling a heavy sigh that does nothing to lighten the weight on my chest, I take my duffle from the table and head to the captain’s quarters, to the room that used to be Seb’s. The door is ajar, and the room is already occupied by none other than my husband. I blink, but he’s still there, long body stretched beyond the bed, palms making a pillow under his head, shiny hair from under his arms sneaking out of his short-sleeve tee. The bottom hem of his shirt lifts a few inches, teasing me with tan skin, tight abs, and a glimpse of his treasure trail.

“Nice of you to show, Captain,” he says, a half smile toying the corner of his lips.

I haven’t seen him since he left me desperate and told me it was my turn to fight for him. I’ve sent him apologetic texts and long voice messages, most of which I deleted before he could listen. I tried to drive to Seb’s house half a dozen times, but what if I ran into Finn? I’m not ready to face him. What if Shay is there?

Excuses, I know.

Whatever I’ve done isn’t close to fighting for him. I still don’t know what I want. That’s not true. I want him, but I don’t want that for him. I don’t deserve him. And I’m scared. I already lost Seb. What if I lose him? What if I lose Finn?

He curls into a seated position at the edge of the bed and widens his knees, drawing my attention between them to the imprint of his dick beneath his joggers.

My cock lengthens, pushing against my zipper. It’s shameful and inappropriate, and Morgan’s eyes dip right to it. I can’t hide the effect he has on me.

He clicks his tongue thrice. “That looks painful. You could have called me,” he says in a gravelly timbre that gives me goosebumps. “Maybe if you’d begged me nicely, I would have taken care of you. But only after you took care of me first.”

He guides my hand to his cock, hardening beneath my touch.

I inhale sharply.

“You’d do anything to taste me again, wouldn’t you?” He grips my good hip and strokes his thumb over the bony ridge of it. “Hm?”

I lick my bottom lip, and nod. His eyes darken. Footsteps echo up the stairs, and I rip my hand back. Morgan keeps a claiming hand on my hip.

“Are you two decent?” Lawrence covers his eyes with his hands as he enters.

“Fuck off,” we both say.

“Damn.” He lowers his hands. “I was hoping you guys had banged it out by now.”

“Don’t joke about that anymore,” I say.

“Oh, joy. I can’t wait for all the brooding silence,” Lawrence says. “I’ll give you two some privacy. I just wanted to warn you, Javi and Alejo will be here soon, and Wes is unpacking, so if you want to have make-up sex, you better get to it.”

“Lawless, bait duty,” I say. “I literally just told you not to joke about that.”

Lawrence scoffs. “We don’t even need tomake bait yet.”