"Hey," I greeted her, as she reached the door way. I stepped aside, gesturing for her to come in. She hesitated for a moment, looked around, and then followed me into the room. I wondered if she was still worried about people talking if they saw us together. Clearly, whatever was on her mind was important enough that she had been willing to overlook that.
"I didn’t expect to see you," I told her bluntly, and, as I looked her up and down, I realized that she was holding an envelope in her hands. "What’s that?”
She glanced down at it, as though she had almost forgotten she was holding it. But then, her face steeled with resolve, and she looked back up at me.
"This is the money you put on our account at the grocery store."
I sighed, rubbing a hand across my face. I supposed I should have expected something like this. I had just wanted to do something nice, something decent, to show her that I appreciated the time she had given me, but she wouldn’t even accept that much.
"You don’t need to do that," I told her gently, reaching out and pushing the envelope away.
"No, I don’t want to owe you anything," she replied. "I – I know you were just trying to help, but I think it’s best if you take this money and then we can be even."
"You don’t have to settle up with me," I assured her. "I wasn’t doing this so you would reach out to me again or anything. I just wanted to show you...well, how grateful I was."
"What, for letting you pay for dinner?" she replied, raising her eyebrows. "I’m sorry, Felix, it just doesn’t make sense to me. I know maybe this kind of money doesn’t mean much to you, but it means something to me, and I wouldn’t be comfortable taking it from you."
She pressed the envelope into my hand, and I looked down at it for a long moment, wondering if I should just accept this and get it over with. But I didn’t need that money, and the way she had made it sound the other day, she could really use a little boost like that. I couldn’t wrap my head around why she was so insistent on taking it this way.
"Please, Dina," I told her softly, trying to get her to see this from my perspective. "I just wanted to help. It sounds like you’re working your butt off all the time to support your family."
"I am," she replied, and then she widened her eyes and looked away from me, like she wished she could take back what she had said. "I mean...I like working hard to help them out. It gives it all meaning, you know?”
"Yeah, but stressing out over this stuff all the time isn’t exactly going to help you in the long run…"
"Felix."
She stopped me in my tracks, her eyes softening as she studied my face for a moment.
"What is it?”
"You never had to worry about money growing up, did you?"
I shook my head.
"No. My family...my dad’s company really started to go international around the time my eldest brother was born. By the time I came along, it was in full swing."
Her gaze was a little hazy, as though she was struggling to imagine what something like that might have felt like.
"I’m so glad you got to grow up that way," she told me. I snorted.
"You don’t have to…"
"No, I’m serious," she corrected me, furrowing her brow. "You’re a really...a really great guy, Felix. And it’s clear that you have your heart in the right place. I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who’s so generous. Not just with money, but with yourself, too."
My chest tightened. Hearing her speak like that, it was almost as though we were getting to the point where she might admit that she wanted to give this thing between us another shot.
"I don’t care about the money," I told her, trying once again to get through to her. "That’s what I’m telling you, Dina. If I can use it to help people..."
I trailed off as the look on her face shifted slightly, and I could tell I had once again pressed on a raw nerve.
"I’m not looking to be your charity project," she told me sharply. "I’ve been perfectly fine till now, and I don’t need someone stepping in and playing hero."
"That’s not what I meant."
She let out a deep breath, and turned to place the envelope on the small table next to the door.
"I’m going to leave this here," she told me. "Please don’t try to pay up any of my accounts again. I appreciate the effort, but...but I don’t want it. Not like that."
