Page 165 of King of Ruin

But Elise didn't give him one.

Xavier didn't let the silence stretch between them.

"It was a mistake," he said, his voice rough as he tried to explain what he had been unable to say before. "I never slept with Astrid. I haven't even touched her." His eyes stayed fixed on Elise's face, desperate for her to believe him. "I never cheated on you."

His fingers tightened slightly around her waist as the words poured out of him, the alcohol making it impossible for him to hide behind the control and arrogance he usually carried. "I was out of my fucking mind. I wanted to make you feel the same jealousy I feel every time you get close to another man. I wanted you to understand what it feels like when I see someone else have your attention."

His voice lowered, the anger disappearing and leaving only the truth he had been trying to avoid.

"I love you so much that I can't fucking breathe when you smile at someone else."

Elise stared at him.

The confession caught her off guard because it was the first time Xavier had ever actually said those words. She had spent months understanding his love through the small things he did, through the way he remembered every little detail about her, through the things he would never admit mattered to him. But he had never looked her in the eyes and said it.

Not until now.

Still, she remained silent.

Her eyes moved over his face, noticing the slight haze in his expression from the alcohol, the vulnerability he would never have allowed anyone else to see. But despite the ache it caused in her chest, she didn't let herself soften.

Xavier watched her silence, and the fear inside him grew.

"Why don't you get angry at me?" he asked, his voice filled with confusion and pain. "Why don't you hate me? You can slap me if you want. You can scream at me. Do anything, Elise. Just show me that you care."

He looked at her as though he couldn't understand her anymore.

"How can I not even stand the thought of another man breathing near you, but you..." His voice faltered before he continued, unable to hide the hurt. "I brought another woman into this house. I told you she was going to be my girlfriend, and you didn't even react."

His expression tightened.

"Why didn't you throw her out? Why didn't you say anything? Didn't it hurt you? Didn't it matter?"

Elise looked at him for a long moment before finally answering.

"You knew what you were doing."

Her voice was quiet, but the calmness in it cut deeper than anger ever could.

"You knew what the result of your actions would be."

Xavier's expression shifted.

"You wanted me to beg for your love."

The moment she said those words, Xavier's expression changed.

The accusation on her face cut through him, and within seconds, panic replaced the anger and frustration that had been consuming him all night.

"No," he said immediately, his voice filled with desperation. "I never intended to make you beg."

His eyes were clear now as he looked at her, stripped of the arrogance and pride he usually carried.

"I swear, Elise, that was never what I wanted."

He shook his head slightly, trying to make her understand. "I just couldn't control what I was feeling. When I saw you with him... when I saw you touching him, talking to him, and then you wouldn't tell me who he was, I was so fucking jealous that I couldn't think straight."

His voice grew rough as he admitted the truth he had been fighting against.