Page 11 of Freeze Frame

“I still find that hard to believe. You seem a bit too good to be true.”

“I can always chew with my mouth open, if you need a flaw of some sort.”

Josh shuddered, but his laughter was bright again. “I think I’ll pass, but thanks for the offer.”

I fought the urge to reach across the seat and put my hand on his or on his thigh. Or to touch his hair and see if it was as soft as it looked. “My pleasure,” I said, trying to keep the desire out of my voice, but judging by the way he looked at me, I’d not been successful.

SIX

JOSH

Even after we’darrived at dinner, it took some time for my heart to slow to a normal rhythm again. Coming out to someone new was always a risk, but David had rolled with it. He’d looked a little surprised, but he recovered quickly. And he wasn’t disgusted. And he didn’t hate me. He wanted to go on the date and get to know me better.

We’d both been here before, but it was truly one of my favorite places. The staff was friendly, and queer, and the food was to die for. The queer part was important to me tonight because though I didn’t mind the age gap, the last thing I wanted was to get mistaken for David’s son.

“What’s your favorite thing here?” David asked as he perused the menu.

“I usually get the pan seared salmon. I’m not much of a cook to begin with, and I can never get fish right, so I tend to get things that I’d never eat otherwise. What about you?”

“I like the Cacio e Pepe. It’s simple, but I can never make a small amount and most of the time I’m cooking for one.Sometimes my son comes over with his boyfriends, but it’s still pretty new with them, and I don’t want to be needy or smothering.”

“Can I ask where your son’s mom is? Are you divorced or…”

“Wendy was a good woman, but she was troubled when I met her. Back then, I was young and dumb and thought love could fix anything. Well, sometimes, it can’t. She left not long after our son was born.”

“That must have been hard.”

“We pushed through.” David closed his menu, and it kind of felt like he closed the subject with it. “How about I order your favorite thing and you order my favorite thing?”

“Uh… okay. Yeah, why not?” I hadn’t actually had David’s favorite here before, so it would be a bit of an adventure. And if I hated it, I wouldn’t feel bad about swapping plates with him.

Our drinks arrived and we ordered our food, and then came the almost inevitable lull in the conversation.

“You never said what you did for work,” I said to him. David was hard to pin down. He was laidback, affable, likeable. He’d be well suited to a myriad of different things.

“It’s not as glamorous as editing film, that’s for sure.”

“Glamor is overrated.”

“I’m a custodian at the university. I’ve worked there since my kid was in diapers.”

“It’s a dirty job, but someone’s gotta do it. Don’t ask me what movie that’s from. I have no idea.”

“Aren’t you a film buff?” David quipped, taking a sip of his drink.

Was this another moment of truth for me? I wanted David. The more I knew about him, the more I liked him. My like had evolved into a full-blown crush, complete with X-rated fantasies. But he didn’t know the other me. The performer me. He’d had yet to meet River.

Our food arrived, breaking up our conversation long enough that it felt weird to circle back to the whole I-fuck-people-for-money thing, so I let it go. I would tell him later.

“This looks sinful.” David stared down at his plate, hunger evident in his expression. With the side of his fork, he cut off a small bite and then stuffed it into his mouth. His eyes fluttered shut, and he let out a moan that had me shifting in my seat.

“Oh, my God.” David looked at me. “Why have I not eaten that before?”

“Probably because you were busy eating this.” With my knife and fork, I sliced off a bit of the chicken breast and popped it in my mouth, taking with it a bit of pasta. It smelled good, but holy shit, it tasted even better. “You know, I had worried that we’d have had to swap plates, but this is so good. Almost as good as my usual.”

“This is a bit better, to be honest. And if you tried to swap it back, I’d have to fight you, and I don’t fight on a first date.”

“This isn’t a first date, though, remember? The dog park.”