Page 50 of Freeze Frame

I reared back like I’d been slapped. Violet’s harsh expression fell, crumpling into something that resembled regret.

“River, I’m sorry. I—there’s no excuse for what I just said.”

I nodded, my expression tightening into a scowl. “He calls me Josh, you know. He makes me feel comfortable around him. Like when I’m with him, he sees the version of me that I’d always wanted to be. The calm, slightly cool, maybe a little awkward dude that it’s taken me years to find when I look into a mirror. He calls me Josh and he accepts me for who I am. With the job I have and the body I have, he doesn’t make me feel bad for any of it.”

“I’ve only ever wanted the best for you.” Violet reached for me, but I pulled away.

“The best for me is for you to be my sister. Not my mother. My mother thinks I’m an abomination. My mother thinks I’ve killed her daughter. My mother hates me and all the choices I’ve ever made. I don’t need you to be that. I need you to be my sister. I need you to celebrate my choices, not judge them. I don’t needunsolicited advice, and I don’t need you to protect me. Especially not from David. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

By the time I finished, my chest was heaving, and Violet had tears in her eyes.

“I—you—Mom still calls sometimes,” Violet blurted. “I never answer, but I always listen to the voicemails. She—I’m not like her. I’m not.” Violet looked like she wanted to reach for me again, so she clasped her hands together and kept them in front of herself.

“If you’re not like her, then you’ll go out there and apologize to David for being an asshole. You’ll sit and make polite conversation, or you’ll leave. It’s that simple, Vi. Supporting me means not being a bitch to my boyfriend. It means not interrogating people like you’re the FBI. It means being happy for me.” My stupid voice cracked the word happy in half, like it was some kind of peace offering that we could share.

“Okay.” Violet sniffled. “For the record, I’m sorry, okay. For all of it. For all the things you told me you’re mad about, and all the things you forgot to mention.” She sniffled again and wiped a tear away. “Okay, one apology coming right up.”

Violet left the room and I followed. The coffee maker rumbled as it finished brewing. Nitro paced in the kitchen. Alone. It was strange for Wally not to be glued to his side.

My stomach dropped to my feet when I realized that Wally was gone. David was gone.

“What the fuck,” I said, more to myself than to Violet.

“Do you think he heard?”

I whipped around to face Violet. “Of course I think he heard.” I wasted no time shoving my feet into my shoes and snapping a leash on Nitro’s collar.

“What are you doing?”

“What do you think? I’m going to find my boyfriend and beg him to forget all the shit he heard my—” I bit back a mouthful of insults. “—sister say.”

“I can take Nitro if you want.” Her offer was sincere, but the last thing I wanted was for her to have my dog so then I’d have to see her later.

“It’s fine. I have him.” I glanced around the apartment, looking for a note that he might have left while I waited for Violet to grab the carrier she came over to collect. Once it was certain that there was no note, I ushered us out of my apartment.

There was no note. No text. Nothing. Just a gaping hole in my chest.

“Riv—Josh. I’m sorry,” Violet said as we took the elevator to the ground floor. “I never meant to upset anyone.”

“Didn’t you, though?” I turned to her, suddenly exhausted to my core. “You weren’t very welcoming. You immediately looked for reasons to hate him.”

“I don’t want to hate him. I just want to make sure he’s good enough for you.”

“You don’t get to make that decision. I do.” The elevator doors opened, and I stepped out, Violet hot on my heels.

“I’m sorry.”

“I know you’re sorry, and what’s worse is that I know I’ll forgive you because you’re family.” I took a deep breath. “But you’re not the only family I have anymore, Vi. Just like you have your dog clients and your friends and your book club girls, I have a whole support system too. You don’t have to be everything for me anymore. I have people who care about me, and one of them is David. I know you’re not fond of my career choice, but some of the people I’ve worked with have stepped in and stepped up when other people in my life shoved me away. And I’m tired of trying to explain to you that my choices are mine. That I don’t want to date your clients' cute gay brothers or whatever. I justwant you to be my sister. Not my mom, not my matchmaker, not anything else. Just my sister. Can you do that?”

Violet nodded. Sniffled. Tried to talk but bit off what was sure to be a sob. Then she nodded again. “I can,” she said, her voice small.

“Good. Then I’ll see you later. I’m going to find my boyfriend.” I started to walk toward my car, but Violet called for me again.

“Josh.” Her voice was still shaky but a little stronger.

I turned my head and made eye contact with her.

“Tell him I’m sorry?”