“Oh yeah, the shots night.”
Nora laughs. “College was fun.”
“Even though you had to see Hero as much as you did.”
“Yes. It’s crazy to think that the night you met Tobias, I met Hero. Only Hero asked me out and then stood me up, and you put Tobias in a hard-core friend zone.”
“I didn’t put him in a hard-core friend zone,” I defend myself. “He just never hit on me. Where else was I supposed to put him?”
“What if you had fallen in love back then?”
“Well, we probably would have broken up because we were kids, and he wouldn't be the best part of my life now,” I tell her.
“Mm-hmm.”
He really is the best part of my life. He’d love looking through this box with us.
Why is the idea of Tobias and me as more than friends so hard to accept?
I sigh loudly as the door to the room opens.
“Hey,” Hero says, poking his head in. “I’m just going to order a pizza for lunch. Any requests?”
“Dessert pizza,” I say with a big old smile.
“And for the main course?”
“Pepperoni.”
“Crust?”
“Thick.”
“Second pizza?”
“Hawaiian.”
That's what Tobias would want. Even though he isn’t here.
“Soda?”
“Water.”
“Do you love Tobias?”
“Yes.”
My head snaps up as Nora gasps. Hero slaps the doorframe as he leaves.
“What just happened?” I ask.
“You finally admitted that what you want is what just happened. Over a pizza order.”
She keeps scrolling through her old phone as I think about the last thirty seconds. I do love him. I love him more than I’ve ever loved anyone. Maybe that’s why I can’t just accept it. Because if it did end, it would hurt the worst, and I’d never recover. But I know it would hurt worse if I never took a chance on him. On us.
You don’t make rash decisions. You need time to think the big things through but will take risks if helps point you in the right direction.
I wasn’t meant to go to his room that night to see a book. I was meant to go so that I could be with him.
