Page 59 of Psychotic Nightmares

“See them.” My brave girl smiles. She has been gaining more confidence around my found family the more time she spends with them - which has been almost daily. Her and Nico have formed a cute little brother and sister relationship, always watching movies and giggling away with each other. She has been cooking with Julian the past couple months too, she wrote that she wanted to learn to cook for her baby and he has been teaching her healthy recipes.

Dante has been teaching her - literally teaching. With textbooks and everything. He has become some sort of in-house teacher. It suits him well, like he’s in his element whenever he has a book in his hand.

Bull has been keeping an eye on her medically. Her and Gustin, me too sometimes when I’m having a bad mental health day. I haven’t tried to harm myself since though. I have to be strong for the two younger ones.

And Pea - well she’s Pea. She has taken us both out shopping, going on spa dates and having movie nights with just us girls. She has become my person - my best friend. If it ever comes to choosing the men or her, I’d pick herevery time. She’s become, as the guys would say, my ride or die.

Girl powerI have heard her say timeand time again.

“Where’s the baby?” Nico bursts through the door, Dante shouting after him. “I want to see the baby.” He comes over and climbs on the bed, still in hispajamas,hair unkempt and flying all over the place as he rubs the sleep from his eyes.

“Careful.” Anya tells him. “She’s delicate.”

“YOU CAN TALK!”Nico is no longer interested in Nattie-Grace and instead is questioning Anya on why she stayed quiet for all this time, instead of closing in on herself like I thought she would, she gives him a genuine smile and asks him what he is hoping for in his stocking. Nico doesn’t let up though, he keeps pestering her on why she has been quiet. I want to know too, but unlike Nico, I won’t badger her for answers.

“Enough, Nico,” Dante picks up his son and flings him over his shoulder. “I’ll be back in a bit,” he pats Gustin's shoulder and strokes Anya's hair. “Let me just settle this one down.”

“But Papa, I want to see the baby.” Nico whines as he hangs upside down.

“You need to go back to sleep.” Dante rolls his eyes. “I swear he’ll sleep through anything, until it comes to people needing peace. I didn’t realise he wokeup and snuck out your room until he opened the door. I’m sorry.” He sounds exhausted and I give him a pitying look. He notices and mouths “are you okay?” I nod in response, but all I want to do is walk over and wrap my arms around him.

It’s been way too long since I’ve had a proper cuddle from him or Julian.

Wayyy too long.

“It’s okay,” Gustin chuckles, replying to Dante's previous statement. “You can stay if you want and I’ll put him back to bed. I can get these two somethingto eat too.” He reaches out for Nico and Dante hands over his son, knowing that Nico will fall asleep quickly with Gustin singing to him.

“Thanks.” Dante sits on the other side of the bed as a whiney Nico cries about how he doesn’t want to go back to sleep. “How are you doing, Anya?” He exhales a chuckle.

“Good.” She smiles slightly. “I’m really good. But I don’t think I could do it again.”

“That’s your choice, honey.” I get comfy by putting my legs up on the bed, Dante does the same. Anya leans her head on my shoulder, never taking her eyes off her baby.

“You have a beautiful baby there. What’s her name?” Dante asks, gliding a knuckle back and forth on her tiny hand. Anya answers him proudly. “That’s lovely.” He grins back.

“Do you need anything?” He asks after a few minutes of blissful silence.

“Hot cocoa.” She yawns. “Please.”

“Of course.” He stands. “Hot cocoa for everybody. I also think Pea is going to lose her mind if she doesn’t come in soon. She is jealous of Bull for being the first to see little Nattie-Grace.”

“Can,” Anya clears her throat. “Can I come sit out there with you all?”

I put my hand over hers, she looksat me intently. “Anya, you are more than welcome to go out there, but you don’t have to pressure yourself into socialising. If you want to rest, you can rest.” I know just how exhausting giving birth can be, especially at such a young age.

She shakes her head. “I want,” she sniffles, “I want to be with my family.” She chokes. “I want to be surrounded by the people who care for me instead of hurtingme.”

“Baby girl, listen to me.” I use the back of my knuckles to wipe away her tears. “As long as we are around, no-one will hurt you, Gustin or Nattie-Grace again. I love you, we all love you. You don’t have to ask to spend time with us, ever. You do a Nicoand Pea and just burst into the room demanding the attention. And we will gladly give it to you as long as we’re not busy.”

“Hell, even if we are, we’ll most probably stop what we are doing to listen to what you need or want because you deserve every bit of positive attention you can get.” Dante adds.

Nattie-Grace starts to whine. Panic spreads across Anya’s face.

“It’s alright. She’s probably just hungry.” I tellher. “Do you want to try feeding her?” She nods her head and Dante goes to make the drinks for the younger ones while I help her with getting Nattie-Grace to latch on.

“Look, she’s feeding.” Anya sobsafter the third try. “Thank you.”

“Anytime.”