Page 81 of Rest In Knotty Pieces

Merle

The weather is dangerous, dark, and threatening, and it keeps me on edge. Every time I relax, the memories surge up, trying to pull me into a dark, whirling maelstrom of nightmares I’m trying to run from.

My sense of self is fading, cracking, collapsing under the weight of impending doom. King and Roseland being absent is like a constant pressure in the back of my mind, stealing any semblance of safety I might be pretending to have.

Blaze watches me like a hawk, while Rolly stays close.

Pix distances himself, but at this point, I don’t even care. I’m fading.

That nickname repeats in my head, over and over, but I don’t know who said it or where. I just know that it makes me feel sick, scared, and ruined.

The weather is so bad that we don’t go anywhere; we just huddle in the cave, and I cling to every word that those alphas whisper, listening to them intently and using them as cornerstones that anchor me to the here and now.

“Merle,” Rolly says and strokes my hair. “You have to eat.”

I blink up at him, and time passes. He’s not in front of me. I don’t remember eating.

“It’s like how she was when she was first brought here. She’s not responding to anything.”

“Just keep her warm and keep her safe,” Blaze says.

Sage is holding me. I register that and fight to come back out of the fugue state, but that name whispers, and I’m drowning in fear.

“Blaze has been gone a long time,” Rolly whispers.

“He’ll come back. He seems like a tenacious psychopath. I sincerely doubt anything will happen to him,” Sage says.

Rolly grumbles. “It’s not like him to be gone so long. Something must have gone wrong.”

“Shh,” Sage whispers. “She’s listening.”

I turn into Sage’s arms, burying my face in the crook of his elbow. He strokes a hand down my back.

“Go back to sleep, Merle. Everything is okay.”

My stomach flutters wildly, and I know that it’s not all right, nothing is, but I don’t have the words or the will.

“Shit, what’s happening to her?”

“She’s convulsing.”

The voices blur together with the world and disappear.

All that remains is the fear, and it chases me downinto the dark.

“There are people in the forest. Lots of them, they are hunting, searching. We have to leave! Now, before it’s too late,” Rolly says urgently.

“Good, I was feeling a little rusty,” Pix snarls and starts pacing.

I clutch the arm that is holding me.

“We’re going to have to get moving. We can’t stay here,” Blaze says. “Rolly’s right. We need to get her safe.”

“What about King and Roseland?” Pix growls.

“We’ll meet up with them somewhere else,” Sage says. “They both have places to go where they can keep their heads down.”

“The good thing is they aren’t looking for us,” Rolly says. “That’s the only surprise we have on our side. Storms raging, and she’s out of it. We’re going to need to move fast.”