Page 56 of The Sound of Him

It’s easy to nod.

Sometimes it’s not. Sometimes the gestures feel just as stuck inside me as spoken words. This time it’s easy, though. It’s so, so easy.

He nods too.

A conversation, almost. Without any words at all.

“That’s the spot I’d use,” he says, pointing past me.

There’s a couch pushed up against the wall to our left, the very end of one arm touching the corner of a side table. There’s a gap between the couch, the table, and the corner where the walls meet. It’s big enough for a body to comfortably sit in. Maybe even lay, if the body was curled up a little. The lamp on the small table would keep it light enough, but from here, you wouldn’t even see anyone unless you were really looking for them.

It’s a good place to hide, he’s right.

“It's yours, if you want it.” I look back at him. He shrugs. “To hide, I mean. No pressure. Come and go as you please. If the door’s locked at the time, just knock. If it isn’t, just come in. Seriously, don’t even stop to say hi to me if you don’t want to. I’ll pretend you’re not even here. I won’t tell anyone where to find you, either.”

The offer feels fragile. Too good to be true. Too kind to be real.

What will he want from me, if I hide in here?It doesn’t feel like he would hurt me, but sometimes those are the men youhave to watch the most. I’m the mute boy, after all.How would I even manage to tell anyone if he did something to me? Who would even believe the guy so traumatized he can’t remember how to talk?

But… he hides too, sometimes. He doesn’t expect things. Not in return for his bags of goodies or his apples or access to his hiding spot. Not words from me. Not even a hello, if the door is unlocked.

Bryce would kill me if he knew, but I trust this.

I trust Ace.

He feels like the realest thing to happen to me in so long.

He makes me feel like maybe I’m not a ghost after all. Or maybe… maybe like if Iama ghost, it’s okay. Like he wouldn’t mind me haunting the place.

Even now, he’s already turned back in his chair to look at the screens again. He didn’t wait for me to acknowledge the offer. It’s just there now. Take it or leave it. No pressure.

“Jake is out for the night, if you’re hoping to get out of here.” He taps a finger twice on the screen to his right. It shows the bedroom from before, the light now turned off. “You don’t have to go. Like I said, that spot is open for you whenever, but I wanted to make sure you saw he’s handled. I don't know where you were headed - I'm sorry, I wasn't watching the feed before - but if it's back to your room, the coast is clear up here.”

I was heading to Nolan, actually, but I’m not so sure I need him anymore.

I forgot about my nightmare. I feel fine now. No phantom swelling. No lack of air.

In fact, I’m breathing better than I have in months right now.

He’s moving things around on the screens now. I watch him drag a box from the middle screen in the top row to the screen right in front of him. He clicks twice on it and settles his hands on the keyboard. He starts typing.

He’s working again.

Of course he is.That was the deal, right?He laid out my options. No expectations. No pressure.

I can keep hiding, if I want, or I can leave. He’ll just be working either way.

I look over at the hiding place one more time. I’d have much more room than when I’m under my bed. Not too dark, but not too bright. A place where the others can’t find me. They can’t come and drag me out, or give me sad eyes, or try to get me to eat.

Not… tonight.

Not yet.

But… maybe, one day.

Just having the option makes it a little less scary to leave the room and face the reality that exists in the rest of the house. The camera feeds help, too. The coast is still clear.

I think about trying to thank him, but he’s typing something, long strings of words filling a little text box. He doesn’t need me to thank him. He doesn’t expect me to. I don’t think he’d be mad if I tried, if I interrupted, but he won’t be mad if I don’t either.