Page 78 of Bound By Ink

His hand freezes in mid-air with the spring roll at his lips, his eyes wide, the half-eaten pastry abandoned. He starts to chew really fucking slowly, then takes a big swallow.

“So, youdon’twant to break up?” He eyes me curiously.

“What?” I screw my face up. “Why would I bring you out to break up with you?”

“I just thought, when you said we needed to talk.”

“Yeah, I want you to choose me. I want to be with you. I don’t want anyone else. I don’t want you to be with anyone else. Fuck, Scott. I just want to be with you.”

His shoulders start bouncing, his cheeks flush, and his eyes glaze. A tear slips onto his cheek when he blinks. It slowly trickles down. I wipe it away and cup his cheek. His eyes close, and he blows out a breath.

“I thought you were dumping me. I thought you wanted to go back to one-night stands and the variety of having other partners.”

“I don’t ever want that again. Scott, I want you. Just you, okay?”

He nods. “I thought when you said boyfriend before that this is what you wanted. That we’re already exclusive. I know what happened with Derren wasn’t ideal, but that wasn’t me, either. I would never. Well, not normally, but I just want you. And when there was a glimpse of a chance, everything else went out of the window. I would have done anything to be with you. I think I would have sold my own brother for that opportunity.” He gives a humourless laugh, trying to swallow around the visible lump in his throat.

“Hey, let’s eat. Then we’ll talk about it more at home. Okay, just know that I’m here, and I’m staying.”

He grins as another tear rolls down his cheek before he swats it away. But I stare at him, wondering how I got so lucky and how the fuck he has never affected me before. Everything about him is perfect. He was here all along, right in front of me. All it took was a vulnerable moment foreverything to crash down on me to see him properly for the first time. The way he’s just so unapologetically him.

He’s different from the guy I saw when he was with Derren. He was a shell of himself. He seemed so unsure, so timid. Wanting to twist himself into knots to fit what Derren wanted, what he thought he deserved. With me, he’s strong, confident, doesn’t put up with my shit, but clearly adores me. I can’t think of anyone better for me. Someone who has seen all my faults and yet loves me despite them.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“What?” I startle from my thoughts. I smile at him, and his gaze softens.

“You okay?” He assesses me, his eyes still a little glassy, his cheeks pink, his lips full and plump. The candle on the table flickers in his glasses. In the shine of his eyes, my heart leaps out of my rib cage, crashing around the cavity. Pounding, my blood floods my body, thudding in my ears. I’ve never felt like this before.

Hookup after hookup has always been fun, but emotionally numb. Nothing but a good workout, a quick release. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve enjoyed the majority of them. But the way he looks at me. The way he touches me, the person he is with me. It’s like being with me makes him feel invincible, and honestly, that’s how I feel knowing that he loves me. That he worships the ground I walk on. But ultimately, will fight for me while keeping me grounded and in check. I just feel so fucking lucky.

“Yeah.” I smile, because how do I relay all that this early on without feeling like a real loser? Falling for someone twelve years younger than me is crazy. Falling for him after everything we’ve been through is just mind-blowing. “Also,” I say, taking a deep breath. “My fights. I know that was something you weren’t aware of, but it’s a big part of my life. It’s how I was able to buy the tattoo shop and flat. I’m almost done paying off Mum’s mortgage.” His mouth drops open a little, and his eyes widen. “Jerry has also been making money from my fights, too. While I know you don’t like that kind of thing, I still have a few lined up. I’m willing to talk about it after that, but I’m committed to these.”

“I would never make you give them up. I was against anything like that. I found it barbaric. But that night, watching you, I can honestly say I was mesmerised. While it’s not something I would have chosen to watch, after being there, I can see the appeal.” He gives me a cheeky smile.

“You thought it was hot, didn’t you?” I grin at him and lean closer.

He mirrors my posture. His foot reaches mine under the table, and he slides it up and down, rubbing on my leg. Flushing a little, he smiles. “I thoughtyouwere hot.” He bites down on his lip, and I groan as I grip his chin, sliding my thumb over his lip and tugging it from between his teeth. “Don’t do that.” He frowns, his brows furrow, and a scowl crosses his gorgeous features. I chuckle. “It kinda drives me wild, Nerd.” I wink and sit back in the chair. His smile makes me squirm as I sit there, lost in his gaze.

Scott

Chapter 44

I eat my food, staring at Killian, blown away by the conversation. Initially, I thought he was bringing me here to dump me, maybe let me down gently, only for him to declare he wants to be mine. To be with me and only me. I know I thought we were exclusive, but talking about it made everything so much more real.

My emotions were all over the place with Derren. The way I ran after him, second-guessed myself, lost my confidence, fawned after him like he hung the moon, all because I didn’t feel worthy, makes me feel sick to my stomach. That wasn’t me. Not the real me, anyway.

But Killian: he makes me feel true to myself. He makes me feel confident and desired. He makes me feel sexy. The way he looks at me, the possessive way he holds my hand wherever we go, like he has to be touching me at all times. Even now, his foot is pressed against mine under the table. His gaze is on me, and I have his full attention.

He’s such a larger-than-life presence. He’s boxer-melting hot; he just has this way about him. Everyone stares at us wherever we go. They have always gazed at him, but now it’s different. He doesn’t notice now he’smine. I watch him in fascination, wondering if I can have it all: my best friend, my lover, my everything.

We make small talk for a while. It’s comfortable, as it always is with him. “Killian, can I ask you a favour?”

“So, you become my boyfriend, and now you want stuff from me.”

I roll my eyes at him because I’m always asking him for favours. This is nothing new, but I owe Becky an apology. I’m hoping he will help me out.

“So, with everything that went on, I kinda had a little falling out with Becky.” I stare at my hands, twisting in my napkin.