Page 38 of The Secret Mate Society

"No."The word came out sharper than I intended."Not yet."

"Calder—"

"I said no!"I turned to face them, my shout still echoing through the garage."I need time to figure this out first.To understand what's happening and what it means for all of us."

Trevor's jaw tightened, but he nodded reluctantly."How much time?"

"A few days.Maybe a week."

"And what about Ethan in the meantime?"Patrick asked."He's still investigating.Still asking questions.Still potentially in danger from both the rogue and the Council."

The thought of either threat reaching Ethan made my wolf pace restlessly beneath my skin."I'll handle it."

"By doing what?You can barely?—”

“I said I’ll handle it!”I shouted, turning back to them both, my hackles up.“Give me a fuckin’ minute to think, alright?I’ll take care of it one way or another.”

Trevor, always the brave Beta, was the first to speak.“Are you sure boss?”His voice was timid, but unwavering.“You don’t have to do everything alone, you know?”

I forced myself to take a deep breath, pushing my wolf and my anger back down.“I know.And I’m glad you both brought this to my attention.I will fix it, okay?I promise.I just need some time to wrap my head around it and figure out what to do.Until then… just don’t tell anyone.Especially not Ageratum.He’s already suspicious.”

Trevor took a step forward, placing his hand on my shoulder.“Alright.We’ll do what we can to keep it quiet.”

Patrick nodded, his hand falling on my other shoulder.“Whatever you need, boss.Just don’t be afraid to ask for help, alright?”

I nodded.“I promise.If I get in over my head… I’ll ask.”

I wasn’t sure either of them fully believed me, but for now it was enough to satiate them.In a few minutes they were both gone, leaving me alone inside the garage.I leaned over the workbench, resting my forehead against the cool metal as I let out a long sigh.

“What the fuck have I gotten myself into?”

Chapter17

Ethan

I’d been avoiding Jake from the moment I showed up for work that morning.Not only was I exhausted from barely sleeping, but I’d spent nearly the entire night trying to figure out what the hell I was going to do.And I still wasn’t any closer to a conclusion.

Jake was the obvious correct choice.The only downside was that we worked together.But he was tall, muscular, handsome as could be, and he made me feel wanted in the way I’d always dreamed.Everything about him was right.Only two things concerned me.If we broke up, I didn’t want to quit my job to get away from him.That and I didn’t know him as well as I liked.His private life had remained private.

But Calder was something else entirely.Not only did I know very little about him, but he was actively trying to resist me.He claimed to be straight despite all evidence to the contrary and it was clear he didn’t want to give in to whatever he was feeling.He kept his private life secret as well, but it didn’t feel like it was for a normal work-related reason like Jake.He washidingsomething.I just didn’t know what it was yet.In fact, the more I thought about it, the only thing we had in common was our dead dads and that didn’t seem like a good enough reason to date someone.He did have a motorcycle though, so that was a plus.

Despite the mountain of evidence that I should avoid him or write him off completely, I just couldn’t stop thinking about Calder.Every time I tried to focus on Jake, Calder was the one that popped into my mind.But hedidn’t want me.I had to keep reminding myself of that.Sure, he’d kissed me in the rain and it was the best fucking kiss I’d ever had in my life.But then he pulled away, terrified by what he’d done.

So why couldn’t I just forget about him?

I glanced up from my computer screen for the tenth time that morning, checking to see if Jake was still in the conference room.He'd been on phone calls all morning, probably following up on the Marcus Greer murder story.The story I was supposed to stay away from.The story that had gotten a man killed just days after I'd interviewed him.

My stomach churned every time I thought about it.If I hadn't gone to talk to Greer, would he still be alive?The rational part of my brain knew that was ridiculous.The attacks had been escalating long before I showed up in Portland.But the guilt gnawed at me anyway.

A shadow fell across my desk, and I looked up to find Jake standing there with two cups of coffee and that devastating smile of his."Peace offering?"he said, setting one of the cups down in front of me."You've been avoiding me all morning."

"I haven't been avoiding you," I lied, accepting the coffee gratefully."Just busy."

Jake pulled over a chair from the neighboring desk and sat down, close enough that I could smell his cologne.That same woodsy scent that had made my knees weak that day in the conference room.

"Ethan," he said, his voice dropping to that low rumble that did things to my insides."About my offer...I hope I didn't come on too strong.I know you're dealing with a lot right now."

I met his brown eyes, seeing genuine concern there.This man cared about me, wanted to protect me from the very monsters I'd been chasing my whole life.Why couldn't I just let him?