Page 50 of The Secret Mate Society

“Are you sure?”I asked, holding his face in my hands.“I don’t need promises, Calder,” I added softly.“I just like being with you.”

“No,” he replied sternly.“I mean it.You’re mine.”He paused.“Is that okay?”

I nodded.“I’ll be yours.But let’s see where it goes before you propose to me, alright?”I couldn’t help chuckling slightly.“Frotting is fun, but there’s a lot more to explore before you commit to this forever.”

A low growl rumbled through his chest at my words, and his eyes flashed with that strange golden light again."I know what I want," he said, his voice carrying an edge of something primal that made my skin prickle with awareness.

"Calder," I said carefully, studying his face in the moonlight."Your eyes just...they're doing that thing again."

He blinked, seeming to come back to himself.The golden glow faded, leaving just those familiar brown eyes, but now they held a flicker of panic."What thing?"

"They were glowing," I said softly."They’ve done it before…"

He went very still beneath me, his entire body tensing."You're imagining things.It's just the moonlight."

But I wasn't imagining it.I'd seen enough strange things in my life to know when something wasn't normal.And there was something about Calder, something I couldn't quite put my finger on, that felt...different.Otherworldly, almost.

"Calder," I started, but he was already pulling away from me, sitting up on the edge of the bed.

"We should clean up," he said, his voice carefully neutral."Get some more sleep."

I watched as he padded naked to his bathroom, his movements fluid and graceful in a way that seemed almost too perfect.When he returned with a warm washcloth, his walls were back up, that vulnerable man from moments ago hidden behind his usual guarded expression.

"Here," he said, gently cleaning the evidence of our passion from my skin.His touch was tender, reverent even, but I could feel the distance he was trying to create.

"Don't do that," I said, catching his wrist."Don't pull away from me again."

His jaw clenched."I'm not pulling away."

"You are," I insisted."Every time we get close, every time you show me something real, you retreat.What are you so afraid of?"

For a moment, I thought he might tell me.His mouth opened, closed, and I saw that familiar war playing out behind his eyes.Then he shook his head, pulling his hand free."It's late," he said, avoiding my gaze."We both need rest."

Frustration bubbled up in my chest, but I forced it down.He'd given me more tonight than ever before, shown me a side of himself I suspected few people ever saw.Pushing him now would only make him retreat further.

"Okay," I said quietly."But I'm not going back to the guest room."

Relief flickered across his features."Good.I...I like it better with you here."

We settled back into bed, and despite the tension, Calder's arms came around me again.This time, though, I could feel the restraint in his touch, the careful control he was exerting over himself."Calder?"I whispered into the darkness.

"Yeah?"His voice was a low rumble against my back.

"Whatever you're hiding...I hope someday you'll trust me enough to tell me."

His body went rigid against mine, his breathing suspended for several heartbeats.When he finally exhaled, it came out as a shaky sigh that stirred my hair.But I didn’t give him a chance to respond before I said goodnight and rolled over.Whatever he was hiding, he needed time to work it out.I could wait.

Chapter22

Calder

My alarm was so soft that it didn’t wake Ethan, but to my wolf ears, it was loud enough to rouse me from my sleep.However, I found it difficult to move just yet.Ethan was pressed up against me, his warmth sending pleasant shivers through my body.The wolf inside me wanted to pull him close and mark him again.He was already covered in my scent from last night… but I had to resist.I was meeting with the Elder Council in an hour and it was already going to take a lot of scrubbing and cologne to cover up the scent of what we’d done last night.

If the council knew what I’d done… Well, let’s just say they hadn’t been very forgiving to wolves in the past that had made the same mistake.Getting attached to humans romantically wasn’t looked upon kindly, especially when I’d done it without the permission of the Secret Mate Society.Not only that, but Ethan already knew I was keeping a secret.He might not know what it was, but if he ever figured it out, the Society would snatch him up and make him disappear before I knew what was happening.And I couldn’t let that happen.

I carefully extracted myself from Ethan's sleeping form, pausing when he stirred slightly.His blonde hair was tousled from sleep, fanning across my pillow in a way that made my chest tighten.He looked so peaceful, so vulnerable.For a moment, I allowed myself to imagine waking up like this every morning, his scent mingled with mine, his warmth beside me.

The fantasy shattered as my phone buzzed again.Another reminder from Ageratum.