Page 33 of Blue in the Deep Blue Sea

I stepped into her path, nudging her aside, then ran after Lorenzo and snatched it from his hand. It was an old notebook with the initials V.D.L. on the cover, but I was so angry at her for embarrassing me in front of them that I hurled it over the cliffs.

“No,” she cried. “It was my dad’s.”

But it was too late. The notebook disappeared into the sea below, its pages fluttering open, filled with hearts, kisses, and letters with our names written across them.

Tears streamed down her cheeks. Her face burned red, and the muscles in her neck tightened as she screamed, “I hate you.”

I laughed.

“Go get it if you want.”?? Lorenzo grabbed her and dragged her toward the cliffs.

The color drained from her face. It turned ghostly pale. Her hands trembled, and her eyes squeezed shut.

“Lorenzo, stop!” I shouted, rushing toward them.

I shoved him away. The moment his hands left her, she crumpled to the ground.

I swallowed hard. Sweat beaded across my forehead as I stared at her lying there with her eyes closed.

A few adults passing by noticed the commotion. They rushed over, lifted her into their arms, and carried her back toward town, to the hospital.

And I just ran.

Like she meant nothing at all.

She hated me.

I got what I wanted.

9

BLUE

Five minutes had passed since Isabella got a phone call from the yacht manager. She got the position. She’d had her interview before mine, and even though I felt relieved that I wasn’t the one boarding the yacht and sailing away, the thought of being alone once again made my chest feel heavy. By now, I could say I’d grown used to it, but you can never truly get used to people leaving. To saying goodbye without knowing if you’ll ever get to say,see you soon.

She slipped her arm through mine as we made our way toward my home.

“It’s just a week,” she said when she noticed how lost I was in my thoughts. “Time will fly before you know it.”

“I know.” I looked at her. “It’s just…” I let out a slow breath. “I’m worried about Gianni. Growing up, I only had him, and now it’s difficult to have just my mom and me.”

“You can always come live with me,” she said. “My dad is usually away on his fishing tours, and my mom is always at the store. My uncle is the one who checks up on me more often than my dad does.”

“I think that would be hard for me too,” I said. Tears filled my eyes. “How is he, anyway?”

“As good as he can be,” she said. “I think that’s why he’s been checking up on me, because no one saw the signs when she…” Her voice faded.

Her eyes filled with tears, and mine were already slipping down my cheeks.

When you lose someone, you always think of that loss as your own. You forget that others lost that person too, that they’re grieving just as deeply. If someone carries it well, it doesn’t mean it hurts any less. It only means they’ve become good at hiding the pain.

She pulled me into a hug, wrapping her arms around me as her tears dampened the skin on my neck. I closed my eyes, my nails digging into my palms. I had only ever allowed a few people to touch me, and lowering that wall with Isabella meant I’d gained another friend. And the summer before, in 2002, I’d lost one.

It was just another day, July 21st to be exact. I worked at the gelato shop and did what I always did. After my shift, I’d head home, clean the house, go to sleep, wake up, and do it all over again. I’d never suffered from the need to be the center of attention or spend every summer day outside. I preferred staying home, locked away with my music. Somehow, it was easier to live inside my dreams until the day I could make them real.

When my shift ended, I locked up the shop and walked toward the town center, but it was far too quiet. I took the path by the port because it was an easier walk home and spared me the steep hill.

A crowd had gathered beneath the cliffs, standing in a circle near the shore. Someone was lying motionless on the pebbles.