Page 83 of Boudicca

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I woke and reached for Maldwyn and opened my eyes when I did not find him beside me. I sat and saw him lacing up his pants. He smiled at me—that shy smile that made his cheeks flush. “Good morning, my queen.”

“Good morning, my lover,” I said.

His smile widened and lost its shyness, though his cheeks remained flushed. He strode to the bed, bent, and kissed me. “I go to check Ennis and Finley and the rest of our herd.” He cupped my cheek with his palm. “Are you well?”

“Very well.” I glanced around the tent, not surprised to see that we were alone. “Would you tell Phaedra she can attend me?”

“Of course.”

“Send word to Cadoc that I will break my fast, take my daughters to see the dead centuria, and then I will call a war council here,” I said. “Have Cadoc send for Addedomaros as well.”

“As you ask, so will I do.” He bowed and then hesitated, clearedhis throat, and spoke quickly. “Boudicca, I am glad I came to you last night. I am glad I could help lift some of the burden from you that comes from taking lives, but you should know I expect nothing from you.”

I sat up straighter. My hair was a riot, falling over my shoulders and covering my nakedness. I studied him silently. Queens and chiefs often took lovers, whether they were married or not. Prasutagus and I had chosen not to, but that had been our preference. I knew many chiefs, like Addedomaros, who had multiple lovers. Queen Cartimandua openly took men and women to her bed, often at the same time. The tribes did not hide from their passions—we embraced them, acknowledged them, explored them without shame or censure. What I saw in Maldwyn’s gaze was not fear of discovery as my lover but respect, concern, and the understanding that I would lead us forward in this new aspect of our relationship, but only if I so chose.

And I realized I did choose Maldwyn. I had no desire to marry again, but my bed had too long been a place devoid of passion. “You led me from a great darkness last night. For that I will always be grateful. You gave me great pleasure and helped me to feel alive again. I look forward to the next night that I welcome you to my bed.”

Pleasure flashed through his eyes and the tension in his shoulders eased. “As will I.” He bent and kissed me again. This time it was filled with a promise of more to come, and I met his promise with one of my own.

He was smiling this time when he bowed to me and finally turned to the tent flap, which opened just before he touched it, revealing Briallen silhouetted by the early morning light. Her gaze went from Maldwyn to me and I watched her lips twitch and then lift in a knowing smile.

“May the joy of the day be with you,” Briallen told my lover.

“Aye, it already has,” he said, and disappeared into the morning.

“’Tis good to embrace life after a night of so much death,” said Briallen.

“I agree.”

“Your bairns are breaking their fast. They and your guard are ready to view the centuria when you are, my queen.”

I heard stirring outside my tent, saw the flickering outline of a newly stoked fire, and heard the murmur of women’s voices. “I’ll eat quickly and then be ready to ride. Have Tân brought to me and be sure my guard is mounted. I mean to make this fast, Briallen. The girls may need to see the dead centuria, but they should not spend overmuch time there.”

“Aye, my queen,” she said.

Phaedra pushed through the tent flap as Briallen exited. She carried a tray with fresh bread, cheese, and meat and a pitcher of mead. I ate quickly as she changed the bandage on my wound and helped me to dress in one of the sets of leather pants and tunic Wulffaed had dyed and decorated for me. She braided my hair loosely again. My muscles were sore. My back felt stiff and my arm ached, but I welcomed the sensations of my body. It was better than being dead inside.

I left the tent and stood close to the cook fire, enjoying the warmth. The day was young and clear. There was little breeze, for which I was glad. Camulodunum would burn for days, and I had not looked forward to smelling it for the time we would be here.

“Mama, we’re ready.” Enfys joined me by the fire. Sunne was beside her with Ceri and her Mona. Behind them Briallen held three horses. My guard was with her, all mounted.

“Mama, may we go now?” Ceri asked.

“Yes, as soon as Tân is here.” I wondered what I should say to prepare them, but as I studied my daughters, I understood that they had been preparing for this moment since I declared war on the Romans. They’d seen death the day we were attacked. They’d seen death last night. They were as prepared as they could be.

Tân arrived shortly, led by a stable hand, and we mounted. Though we moved at a quick trot, it took longer than I expected to reach the tree line where the caravans had been the night before. All but one of the large covered carts and a modest tent had retreated into the forest with the rest of the army. I motioned for our group to halt andhurried inside the tent. There were many fewer pallets in this tent than in the larger one I’d entered last night, but it was obvious that the warriors in the pallets had all been mortally wounded. Several women silently tended them. They looked up at my entry and bowed. I found Adara sitting beside one of the pallets holding a dying man’s hand. I was silent as the soldier rattled his last breath and she closed his eyes and covered his face with his blood-soaked cloak. Adara sighed deeply before standing to face me.

“You look much better this morning, Queen Boudicca,” she said.

“You look exhausted,” I said.

She nodded. “Such are the ways of war for a healer.”

“You have my gratitude. How may I aid you?”

Adara looked around the tent and then motioned for me to follow her outside. She drew a deep breath of the morning air and rolled her shoulders before answering me. “Those inside the tent will die today. Then I can join the rest of the camp. I will need the tent taken down and packed. Rhan is supervising the funeral pyre.” She jerked her chin out toward the cleared area beyond the tree line. I could just see the smoke that hovered above Camulodunum. Between the distant city and the tree line a pyre was being built. Beside it was an open-sided tent. I didn’t need to see within it. I knew that it was where Rhan was overseeing the preparation of the dead. “She and I will light the fire and speak the prayers for the dead.”