Page 5 of A Thousand Second Chances

I drag in a breath, followed by another, and the world gradually returns to focus. The girl with the rainbow dreads is studying me curiously, her eyebrows raised in silent query. Gathering my courage, I force myself to approach. Chris still hasn’t looked at me. He has his body tucked between the rows of seats, and I can’t tell if he’s purposefully ignoring me or if he hasn’t noticed me yet. I try not to give in to my growing doubts.

There’s no reason things need to be awkward between us. Sure, we have a lot of history, not all of it great. But that doesn’t mean we have to let that ruin our trip. And if my heart gives a little lurch at the prospect of talking to Chris again after all this time, well, that’s only understandable. Whatever else has happened, we were best friends once. Maybe…maybe this is our chance to salvage something from the rubble of our old friendship.

That thought gives me the strength to take the last few steps. Shuffling uncertainly in the aisle, I stare at Chris’ tight-lipped expression and the girl’s amused grin and clear my throat.

“Hi.”

three

Chris

I always knew theuniverse was out to get me. If I needed any more proof, it’s standing right next to me with an obnoxiously hopeful expression plastered across its unfairly handsome face. Here I am, trying to do a good deed for my friend by keeping her company on a stupid school trip I don’t even care about, and not only am I stuck with Devon, one of my former teammates who turned their backs on me—I’m also trapped with the boy who broke my heart two years ago.

Seeing Percy again releases a deluge of memories I thought I’d buried. All those times I’d watched him hurry down the too-tight corridors of our high school with a teetering pile of books tall enough to conceal his face. How his fingers always seemed to be seeking something new to fidget with. The way his eyes sparked behind his glasses while considering a new coding challenge…and how those blue flecks of ice melted into something warm and soft whenever they fixed on me.

There’s a hint of that warmth now as he regards me, his breathless “Hi” hovering between us like an invocation.

I’d tried to ignore him when he’d first come to the ferry’s upper deck, slinking down in my seat and hoping he’d take the hint. He hadn’t. And now that I’d made the mistake of looking at him, I can’t look away. I know I’m staring, but Percy’s staring right back, his eyes locked to mine as if by some magnetic force.

Percy was never much of an athlete. In the three years I knew him, he never made more than a half-hearted attempt to exercise, and God forbid he participate in an actual sport. But that doesn’t stop me from admiring the lean lines of his legs in his snug jeans. I remember running my hands down those firm thighs, feeling the light dusting of hair there—one of a thousand stolen moments solely our own.

The memory twists and stutters, Percy replaced by the ashamed faces of my parents on the night everything started to fall apart. Whatever spell binds us together snaps, and I tear my eyes away from him, grimacing at the seat in front of me.Hi.As if the last two years had never happened. As if he hadn’t ruined my entire fucking life.

Percy shifts nervously. Déjà vu washes over me as he reaches up to adjust his glasses. I clench my jaw and pretend to ignore him. Whatever we’d once been to each other, that was in the distant past. Percy had made sure of that.

“Um, hi,” Quinn says after a beat, glancing from me to Percy with the question written clearly on her face. “I don’t think we’ve met before. I’m Quinn, and this is Chris.”

“Nice to meet you, Quinn. My name’s Percy.” He hesitates, his eyes flicking from her back to me. The wind ruffles his hair again. With the breeze up here, it’s going to be a tangled mess by the time we reach the island. My right hand twitches in my lap, and I clutch it firmly in my left, angry at myself for the impulse to smooth his hair down like I used to when we were alone.

Percy must come to a decision because he squares his shoulders in a determined way that I refuse to find cute. “Sorry to interrupt, but Chris and I know each other already. We went to the same high school. I was hoping for a chance to talk to him in private. Would you mind giving us a minute to catch up?”

Being alone with Percy is the absolutelastthing I want. “Anything you have to say to me, you can say in front of Quinn.”

Some of Percy’s confidence fades, revealing a flash of hurt beneath. I smother the impulse to apologize.He’sthe one who walked away. If anyone here should be upset, it’s me.

“Please,” he says, his eyes wide and hopeful. “It won’t take long.”

I cross my arms “Then you might as well get started.”

He sighs, and now Quinn is glaring at me likeI’mthe asshole. If only she knew the whole story.

“Fine.” Percy visibly gathers himself, biting his bottom lip. “I, uh, know it’s been a while since we talked. But I saw you sitting here, and since we apparently both signed up for this trip, I figured we should clear the air. You know, make sure we can both enjoy our weekend. There’s no reason we can’t at least be cordial with one another.”

Distant lights twinkle behind him across the water. Laughter rises from the deck below along with the chatter of the other passengers, Devon’s deep voice distinct among them. A chill wind billows over us while a plume of water rises in the ferry’s wake to propel us forward. And all I can think about is the last thing Percy had said to me before today:I’m sorry, Chris, but I can’t do this.

I realize I’m trembling, though not from the cold. Slowly, I rise, tightening my grip on the seatback in front of me. “Cordial?Cordial? You want me to becordial?”

Doubt flickers over Percy’s face, along with something else I can’t parse. “Er…yes?” He clears his throat. “I mean, you’re here, and I’m here, and—”

“Andnothing!” I snarl. “Just because we’re stuck together for the weekend doesnotmean we have to interact. You do your thing, and I’ll do mine. As long as you stay the hell away from me, we’ll survive.”

Percy lowers his gaze to stare at the wooden deck. “I…I thought maybe we could talk. Catch up on the last couple of years.” His eyes flick again to Quinn. “A lot’s happened since then.”

An incredulous laugh escapes me. Percy winces at the harsh sound. “Oh,nowyou want to talk? Sorry—you’re about two years too late.”

“At least give me a chance to explain,” Percy says softly. “I don’t expect you to understand or forgive me, but—”

“Damn right I don’t forgive you! We both know the only reason you’re even talking to me now is because of this stupid trip. If you really cared, you wouldn’t have waited so long to track me down.”