Page 169 of The Exit Strategy

That I’m forgiven.

But I also know that forgiveness means nothing if I don’t make up for my mistakes with Junie.

I don’t know if she’s crying.

If she’s angry.

If she’s taking care of herself.

If she’s slept.

If she’s still wearing my ring.

I don’t get to know.

Fixing things myself came at a price I could never afford.

29

REINFORCEMENTS

JUNIE

The knockat my door is…calm.

It means my brother has arrived.

I knew he was coming.

After the shock of last night, Fen didn’t take any chances and has been updating me privately on literally everything.

So when I open the door and Nolan steps inside with his arms held out wide, I fall into his embrace.

He doesn’t ask me how I am or what I need him to do.

He just…holds me.

And it’s exactly what I need.

I forgot how much I miss my big brother.

“Junie?”

I squeeze him tighter because if I let go, I’ll cry. I’m not ready to cry yet. Crying means something ends.

“Junebug, I’ll hug you for as long as you need, but it’s getting late, so please tell me you have food because I haven’t eaten in a very long time and I have no idea how late delivery works out here in geriatric world.”

I sniffle against his chest. I do not cry. “I have plenty of food. They have an entire committee devoted to it, I think.”Finally, I release him and lead him by the arm to the small kitchen that I’ve rarely used.

Somehow, I just always ended up in Cole’s.

“Sit. I’ll see what they brought over.”

“I honestly don’t care what it is at this point. Just feed me, Junebug, because I’m about to eat my own arm off.”

Nolan’s the only one who ever called me Junebug. He stopped using the name when I was in high school and the mean girls started throwing bugs at me in the hallway. I never did prove that Natalie facilitated that attack, but no one else spent any time in our home, so she’s the most likely culprit even though she had long left high school.

I open a Tupperware of what looks like a pesto pasta, and Nolan rips it out of my hands.