My doorbell rings. I open my eyes and look at my clock. Shit, it’s only seven in the morning; who the hell is at my door so early and on a Sunday? I didn’t drink last night, so I can get out of bed fast. I drag myself to the door in my tiny shorts and tank top. I don’t bother looking through the peephole. If someone is planning to come after me, they aren’t going to ring the doorbell. I open the door and see Serena. She’s wearing a very sporty outfit and looks like she’s ready for a marathon.
“Time to wake up and get ready?” she says as she enters my apartment. I see two cups in her hands and hope to god one is for me.
“Good morning. Please tell me that is for me.” I motion to the cup in her hand.
“Yes, it’s to wake you up. Then you need to get ready. We have somewhere to be.”
“Yes, bed,” I mutter, still half asleep.
She laughs. “Nice try. You have twenty minutes to change into something more athletic,” she tells me as she hands me the coffee. “I’d get going if I were you. I don’t like to be late, and believe me, you don’t want to be late for this.” That’s ominous.
I yawn. “You’re bossy, you know.”
“I know. Now go get ready,” she orders
When I asked Serena to hang out so we could talk, this was not what I had in mind. We enter Nina’s kickboxing gym. It’s actually very close to my apartment, but we were late, so after my attempt to warm up, Nina made us run a couple of laps. If you’re on time, you’re late, and if you’relate, you’re fucked. Well, that should be the motto when it comes to Nina as your instructor.
“You know, some heads up would have been nice,” I say in between breaths. Fuck, I am so out of shape.
“You wouldn’t have come if I told you.”
She’s right. My only workout consists of dancing at the club and walking on my treadmill. This shit is intense. “You’re probably right.” She looks at me, and it’s intimidating. “Okay, you are one hundred percent right.”
Nina approaches us. She scares me. “Are you ready?”
“No,” Serena and I say in unison.
I didn’t even make it thirty minutes. Not only can I not feel my legs, but I’m pretty sure I’m going to pass out. I sit and watch Serena and Nina spar. They are both badasses. It’s obvious they’ve trained together for a long time. Neither relents, so after a while, they both concede and make their way to me.
“How are you holding up, Veronica?” Nina asks.
“I’m barely alive.” I’m only half joking. Nina laughs. “You should come back. It would be good for you.” I look between them.
My insecurities begin to creep in. My body—she must be referring to my body.
“I use it to relieve stress,” Serena admits. “It’s also a good way to learn how to defend yourself, especially seeing as you’re living alone.” She grabs her water. “You can also hold your own against nosy brothers and cousins.” She smiles. I exhale a breath I didn’t know I was holding.
“Yes, because fuck those guys,” Nina shouts. “I don’t even know them that well, but damn, they look intense.”
“Yes.” My voice comes out low. I can’t believe I’m going to admit this. “I thought you meant because of my body?” Nina and Serena look at each other.
“What about your body?” Nina asks.
“Nothing, it’s dumb.” I hesitate, but they don’t push. I don’t usually admit this to others. “When people look at me, they expect me to be a size two, blue-eyed, blonde bombshell. My mind just goes to the negative.”
“Vee.” Serena moves next to me. “Fuck them, and for your information, you are a blue-eyed, blonde bombshell.”
“If I wasn’t happily married, I’d be all over you,” Nina whispers, for only us to hear.
I can’t help the abrupt laugh that comes out of me. Nina grabs my shoulder and motions for me to face her. “Veronica, everyone is going to have an opinion about you. Look at me and Annie. We are happily married, but that doesn’t mean everyone is rooting for us. So, try to block out the noise.”
“It’s just so hard being a Kayde,” I admit. “The pressure to be someone.”
“Vee.” I can hear the emotion in Serena’s voice. “You are someone. You are more than a Kayde.” She wraps her arms around me. When she pulls away, I see tears running down her face.
“I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“No, you didn’t.” She uses her long-sleeved shirt to wipe away the tears. “It’s just that…well…I hate that you feel this way about yourself. I know what it’s like trying to fit into someone’s expectations.” She closes her eyes. When she opens them, I see a resolve in her. “Be the version of yourself you can be proud of when you look in the mirror.”
