Page 72 of Derivation

“What? Where did that come from?”

“She’s been in her room for most of the week, and when I asked if she wanted to have dinner with all of us last night, she told me she was going out for something to eat instead. I thought maybe she had a date and just didn’t want you all to know because you’d make fun of her.”

“Sarai goes through these phases where she needs to be alone. That’s pretty normal for her. And I have no idea if she’s seeing someone or even thinking of dating anyone, but you could try asking her.”

“She’d have to come out of her room for me to do that.”

“You know you can just knock, right?” Arlowe asked.

Gabi sighed and replied, “Arlowe, it’s not that simple. I really liked Sarai. I saw her, and I felt something that I had never felt before. When I got home, I told my mom about it, and she said it sounded like love at first sight. My dad disagreed and said it was probably a crush, which I get him saying because he still thought of me as his little girl, so he didn’t think I could possibly meet someone and just know.”

“You were in love with her?”

“It was only a weekend; a little more than sixty hours. I hadn’t ever felt that before, so I don’t know, but we stayed up after the bars or the clubs, talking about everything that really mattered, and it felt like the things that should line up, lined up. She was also just so pretty and funny. She took me for French fries, and we walked around the city until we found those really big clogs that you can stand in, looking ridiculous. She took pictures of me, and we laughed. I’d had a girlfriend before, but I hadn’t felt how I felt about Sarai.”

Arlowe nodded and asked, “And how do you feel now?”

“Like it’s still there, but things are even more complicated now. We’re older, but there’s more baggage with age, and on top of that, I’m living here right next to her.”

“That could make things really convenient.”

“Or, really complicated,” she suggested. “Like you said before.”

“Maybe, but that was because I wasn’t thinking about you and me dating or being in a relationship, so you would’ve seen me bring other women home after we did whatever we would’ve done, and that could’ve been messy. Sarai’s not like me.”

“I thought she brought someone home after the party.”

“She did: an accidentally drunk Enya. Drunk Enya is hilarious, by the way,” Arlowe said.

“No, I mean, I thought she brought home the woman who was flirting with her at the party. I thought she slept with her.”

“And you were pissed?”

“I was sad, Arlowe. I don’t have any right to be, but I was. Sarai and me, we take a step forward, and not to sound like a certain song, but then, it’s two steps back. Last weekend, she told me that she took Enya home, so we were good. Then, I don’t know what happened, but that Sunday, we were working, and I must have done something wrong because she hasn’t talked to me much since.”

“She hasn’t talked to any of us much since.”

“So, you’re saying that how she’s been has nothing to do with me?”

“I’m saying that she’s done this before; that’s all. Look, I want to go out tonight and have a few drinks. I need to get out of this house. I have been working non-stop. You should come with me. I think you could use getting your mind off Sarai and just relaxing.”

“I don’t want to get my mind off her. I want to find a solution.”

“It’s not a problem to be solved.” Arlowe patted her on the shoulder and stood. “They’re feelings. Trust me, if they were a problem to be solved, I would’ve solved mine already. Now, come on; you’re going out with me tonight. Your only responsibility is to have a drink and maybe order an Uber if my phone dies because I forgot to charge it before we go.”

Gabi laughed, but she could agree that she could use a night out. She wanted it to be with Sarai, but it might be better for her to hang out with Arlowe instead. Sarai could have more time to herself, and she could relax a little after working nine hours a day at her actual job and then three or four a night on the hardware for her new side job.

She couldn’t help herself, though: she stopped in front of Sarai’s door after Arlowe had disappeared behind her own. Gabi went to knock, but her hand stopped mid-air. It wasn’t about what she wanted. She needed to respect what Sarai, apparently, needed, so she dropped her hand and went into her own room, where she got dressed. Arlowe had taken a little longer to get ready, but when she finally made it to the living room, she ordered them a car, and Gabi joined her on the front porch to wait for it when it was only a minute away.

“How drunk do you want to get tonight?” Arlowe asked her.

“What?” Gabi laughed.

“Well, are you in the mood to get wasted and forget your troubles, or get mildly tipsy?”

“I’m in the mood to get out of the house and, apparently, order you an Uber because your phone will be dead by the time you’re ready to come home.”

“I charged it while I was getting dressed, so I should be fine. I’m going for moderately drunk, so if you see me going too far, shove me into a car.”