Page 21 of A Laird and a Healer

“And what rumors would they be?” he asked, his eyes glazing over. He leaned against the far wall. The distance between them seemed vast, and yet somehow she felt that if she lifted her hand she would touch him again, as though an invisible thread would be drawn, bringing them together.

“That ye kill anyone who trespasses on yer land, and ye kill them in a violent way. That ye show nae mercy tae anyone who wrongs ye.”

Ryan sipped his drink and looked away. “I believe that without fear, people will nae respect ye. I will nae hae bandits thinking that they can run through my territory and dae whatever they want. My people feel safe. They know that I will always defend them and their land. Hae I hanged people for trespassing? Aye, but I doubt I hae hanged as many men as people seem tae think. But, sometimes what people believe is more powerful than the truth,” he rolled his shoulders as he spoke. It was a cunning way to think.

“Why dae ye keep yer borders sae well-defended?”

“As I said, I want my people tae feel safe. The Highlands are wild and if ye are nae careful, a disaster can befall a clan. I hae worked hard tae maintain a sense of control over my land. I dinnae want anything tae jeopardize that.”

“And yet ye are willing tae make an outsider yer wife. Why dae ye want tae marry me?”

“Because it’s time for me tae take a wife.”

Caroline sensed that he was holding something back. She tilted her head to the side and placed the goblet back on the table, next to the candle. She didn’t want to give him any further advantages. She could already feel the dizzying feeling in her mind. It hadn’t helped that the night had been a long one already. She feared that sleep was not going to bless her.

“But ye could hae any wife. Why force me intae the marriage? Ye hae a clan filled with women, and since ye are a Laird ye could use yer position tae arrange a marriage. I refuse tae believe that ye were waiting for a woman tae stumble ontae yer doorstep.”

Ryan smirked at the thought. “And ye would be right tae dae sae.”

He placed his goblet down and pushed himself off from the wall, striding towards her. He closed the distance with dramatic speed, and, suddenly, he filled her vision. His breath drifted towards her, warm and soaked with wine. His gaze was as intense as ever and seemed to drill down to her very soul. Now that he was standing, she was forced to tilt her head back once again. Even though she was on her feet, it felt as though she was on her knees.

“Sae why dae ye want tae marry me? What is it ye hope tae accomplish? There are many rumors about ye, but after seeing ye taenight I dinnae believe ye are cruel for cruelty’s sake, and I dinnae think that ye would want tae spend yer life with a woman who hates ye.”

“Dae ye hate me?”

The question whipped through the air, and the fact that she didn’t immediately respond shocked and surprised her. She almost felt as though she was betraying herself. As it happened, Ryan was not expecting an answer. He continued speaking, but something changed about him. His eyes became hard again, as though winter passed through his soul and made him icy.

“How much dae ye know about the rivalry between our clans?”

“I know that we hae been enemies for many years. I assume it’s because of territory disputes. There never seems tae be enough land tae gae around. Tae be honest, I never thought much of it. It may surprise ye, but I hae never spent a lot of time thinking about war. There are far more pleasant things tae occupy my time.”

“Aye, I’m sure there are. But if ye hae paid attention, then perhaps ye would understand my motivations better. Ye see, Caroline, I know who ye are.” He raised a finger and the thick tip was pointed towards her. “More importantly, I know who yer Da is. Did he ever come back from battle and tell ye about his glorious victory? Did he tell ye about all the men he killed and the blood he spilled?”

Caroline’s throat tightened. She choked on her breath. “Nae. I dinnae want tae know about those things, and he wanted tae protect me from it,” she replied.

It wasn’t too much of a shock to her that he knew she was the Laird’s daughter. He was too canny for that detail to escape his attention.

Ryan nodded slowly. “Well, perhaps if ye hae then ye would know why there is such enmity between us. Aye, it started off with a dispute over land. But it quickly turned intae something else. Ye see, yer Da killed my father and brother in battle, leaving me as the sole hair tae the clan. I was only sixteen, still a boy in many ways, when their bodies were brought home. I hae tae bury them and when I did all I could think about was the man who killed them, the man who hae been able tae return home and share in the triumph of battle, who probably would nae spare a thought for my family.”

Caroline gasped and suddenly realized that the situation was more dangerous than she first believed. She was valuable to Ryan because of her family, and nothing more.

“That man took everything from me,” Ryan’s voice grew deeper and more rasping, while his features became more feral. Color bloomed on his cheeks and he adopted a scowl. “And on that day I swore that I would hae my revenge. I hae been patient. I hae plotted and waited for the perfect opportunity, and then who should show up at my Keep but his daughter? His eldest daughter at that. Sae I am gaeing tae marry ye, and we will hae an heir that will allow me tae press a claim against the clan. He took everything dear tae me, sae I will take everything that is dear tae him, and ye will watch as I strangle the life out of yer clan and make sure that the Gilmour name is buried sae deep in the dirt that even the worms cannae get at it,” he snarled, the words hotter than fire as they burst into the air.

Caroline flinched, and her mouth dropped open in horror. All this was because of her father? She remembered him returning from battle. She had never wanted to know the details. It was all too grisly for her, but she had never considered that the men he killed had lives and families of their own. They had all been nameless and faceless to her. It was easier to cope with in that way. But on one of those occasions, a sixteen-year-old boy had been left without a family.

Violence never seemed to resolve anything. It only spread more hurt around because that sixteen-year-old boy had turned into a vengeful Laird who was now going to ruin her life because of her father’s sins.

“But I… That dinnae hae anything tae dae with me,” she gasped.

Although she had started to think that Ryan was more than cruel, she wondered if it was part of his facade. Was he just trying to charm her in order to make the humiliation more savage? This insistence on giving her clan emblem back to her might have seemed like a kind gesture at first, but it could have simply been an insult. She was used to seeing the best in people, but sometimes there was only ever a small element of this. She couldn’t afford to be naive here. He spoke of honor, but she wondered if he knew the meaning of the word. What kind of honor was there in this kind of revenge?

“On the contrary, lass, this hae everything tae dae with ye. The rightful heir was taken away from this clan, sae ye are gaeing tae give me an heir that will unite the clans. Our blood will mix in them and I will wrest yer clan away from yer Da. I cannae wait tae see the look on his face,” a dark smile spread across Ryan’s features, and only then did Caroline realize that Ryan was unaware of the recent occurrence in the clan.

She was hesitant to tell him the truth as she feared what effect it might have, but she thought he was going to discover it eventually. Perhaps it might even dissuade him from his plans. After all, what use was revenge when the focus had already died?

“It will take some miracle for that. I fear that ye are nae gaeing tae get the satisfaction ye desire. There is nae use trying tae get revenge on a dead man,” her voice hitched as she spoke. It was still difficult to talk about her father’s death. Confusion was etched upon Ryan’s face.

“Dead? Yer Da is dead? When did this happen?” the questions rushed out of his mouth.