Page 16 of Unbreakable

“I want this. I want us.”

I kiss her, and this time it’s different than the coffee shop. This time it’s not desperate or relieved. This time it’s tender and exploratory, like we’re figuring out who we are together.

When we break apart, she’s smiling.

“Your place or mine?” I ask.

“What?”

“To hang out. To talk more. To figure out what comes next.”

“Oh. Um. Mine’s a mess, but my roommate’s at her parents’ this weekend, so we’d have privacy.”

“Then yours.”

Chapter 10

Cassie

My dorm room suddenly feels very small with Tyler in it, who is twice the size of me.

He’s looking at my bookshelves, reading the spines, and I have to stop myself laughing, because I don’t think he knows any of them. He laughs at my eclectic mix of romance novels, literary fiction, memoirs, and academic theory.

“What?” I ask defensively.

“Nothing. I just like seeing what you like. It’s very you, smart and emotional and unafraid to read things that might make you feel things.”

I sit on my bed, and he joins me, keeping respectful distance but not too much, and I don’t want him to either.

“Can I ask you something?” he says.

“Sure.”

“Do you regret sophomore year? I mean, I know it was terrible. But do you regret it in the sense of wishing it never happened?”

“That’s a weird question.” That's really not what I thought he was going to ask, but I don’t think anyone would ask something like that.

“I know. But I’ve been thinking about it, and if sophomore year hadn’t happened, you might not have become the fierce, protective, brilliant person you are now. You might not have written all those pieces about toxicity and silence. You might not have this clarity about what you want from people.”

“I’d rather have had that clarity without the trauma.”

“I know. I’m not saying it was good that it happened. I’m saying that people are shaped by their experiences, and I’m grateful that you survived yours and came out stronger.” I lean against him, resting my head on his shoulder.

“That’s very thoughtful.” I whisper.

“I have my moments.”

We sit in comfortable silence for a while.

“I want to have sex with you,” I shut my mouth not believing I just said that and I immediately tell him. “Not necessarily tonight. But at some point. Soon. Before I overthink it and convince myself it’s a bad idea.”

He laughs. “Sex is never a bad idea.”

“I’m a direct person, and think about these things.”

“I noticed. I like it.” He turns to face me. “I want that too. When you’re ready. Not before.”

“I’m ready now.”