Page 234 of Ruthless Court

“My first boyfriend wasn’t really my boyfriend.”

Her expression changes.

“What does that mean?”

“His name was Ryan. He played for Dad’s program.”

I close the book.

“He started talking to me junior year. Asked for help in chemistry. Then he started waiting for me after school and sitting with me on the bus to Dad’s gym.”

“That sounds like dating.”

“I thought so.”

The memory arrives in pieces.

Ryan stealing my Twizzlers.

Ryan telling me I looked pretty without my hair pulled back.

Ryan asking what Dad thought about his release, whether college coaches had called, whether he might start getting more minutes.

I mistook the questions for nerves.

Maybe some were.

Not enough.

“He said he liked me because I wasn’t like the girls who followed the team around.”

Noor’s mouth tightens.

“I was the girl following the team around.”

“You had a reason.”

“He had one too.”

I pick at the frayed corner of the cover.

“He thought being close to me would make Dad invest in him. More film. More private workouts. Calls to recruiters.”

“Did it?”

“For a while.”

Dad started giving Ryan extra time because I asked. He stayed late to watch him shoot. Sent clips to two small colleges. Drove him to a showcase when Ryan’s parents couldn’t get off work.

I thought I was helping someone I loved.

Ryan thought he had found a useful entrance.

“How did you find out?” Noor asks.

I stare at the line of books across from us.

“Homecoming. I went looking for him before class.