Page 129 of What Should Have Been Ours

I think if I didn’t have someone I loved as much as I love her, I could probably face my ending with a little more peace. Hell, if she hadn’t come back into my life when she did, I probably would’ve given in already.

But she did come back.

And now I feel like I can’t give in. Not yet. Not until my fingers are pried away from hers and I’m forced to let go.

Sitting here with Gabrielle, listening to my mom and her talk about our wedding next week, feels so surreal.

I knew, somehow, that I’d always marry this girl. Even when it felt like a delusional fantasy. Even in the years we spent apart, I still knew. But back then, I thought we’d have so much more after. Knowing I can’t give that to her? It kills me.

I’ve made peace with my mortality. It’s her heartache that’s harder to accept.

I’m pulled out of my thoughts when my mom nudges my arm.

“Cam,” she says softly, like she knows my mind was drifting off. “Did you and Wes get fitted for your tuxes yet?”

I blink, trying to refocus, then nod. “Yeah. Wes made it a whole dramatic fashion show for himself, but we got it done.”

Gabrielle smirks, resting her chin on my shoulder. “Everything about Wes is a dramatic show.”

I chuckle. “Very true.”

Mom laughs, shaking her head. “Well, I just want to make sure everything is set. Gabrielle’s dress is finished, and we’ve got all the final details coming together.”

Gabrielle looks over at me. “Is there anything you want? Any little details that matter to you?”

I don’t even have to think about it. I shake my head, brushing a hand over her thigh. “Everything you want, I want.”

She tilts her head, studying me. “Cam, seriously. It’s our wedding. There has to be something you care about.”

I smirk. “I care about you being happy.”

Gabrielle rolls her eyes, but I catch the way her lips twitch up into a smile.

My mom sighs, resting her hand over her heart dramatically. “Well, if that’s not the best husband answer I’ve ever heard.”

Gabrielle leans in, pressing a kiss to my cheek. “I guess you’re already nailing the whole husband thing then.”

Mom grins. “Happy wife, happy life.”

Everything about this moment—the laughter, the joy, the planning for a future I might not be here for—I love all of it.

All of her.

And I refuse to let the darkness that’s looming over us steal these moments away from her.

Not today. Not ever.

Not as long as I’m breathing.

57

Gabrielle

The world feels different today. Lighter? Like maybe, just for a little while, I can live in this version of reality.

For the first time in months, I’m letting myself believe in a kind of happiness that isn’t on borrowed time.

Today isn’t about grief or sickness. It’s about love. It’s about us.