Page 142 of The Bonds of Indigo

Her back curves and she clenches so tight around me that Gods, I nearly come immediately. Especially as her taste floods down my throat.

“Kayn, oh fuuuck. I’m—please, please fill me. Come inside me. Come with me. I’m…”

I place one hand on her ass, the other around her breast, and there’s no holding out anymore. My entire body succumbs to her request. Just as she shakes through her climax, I’m equally vibrating under my own, and I come harder than I did the first time we fucked.

The space around us is stuffy, and the moment she shifts even slightly, we’re sticking to each other. I pull my fangs free of her and simply smile. It widens when she leans into me and goes limp.

I take my time moving my hands along her back, feeling the uneven skin; the canyons of scars leading down to her round ass. My fingers want to touch every part of her, because the idea of stopping sends an ache straight through my stomach. I want to map every inch, to know how many scars she has, to understand where they came from so I can help heal the mental pain buried beneath them.

I want to share all of it with her. The pain, the pleasure, the happy, the sad.

My fingers trail down to her arms, touching gently, but when she draws in a breath that catches in her throat, I pause.

“Shit,” she says, and I can hear the tears in the word.

“Oh, fuck, Amarah. What’s⁠—”

“Don’t…” She wraps her arms around my neck. “Just… keep going.”

Swallowing hard, I do exactly as she asks, letting my hands continue their slow path across her skin while one arm snakes around her waist to hold her steady.

“Thank you…”

I nod and close my eyes, listening to her shaky breathing, her frantic heartbeat, the soft trembles running through her.

“You’re okay with me, Amarah. I’ve got you.”

“I know… I know…”

She reclines back—not far—just enough to press her forehead to mine. “Don’t stop touching me. Please.”

“Never.” I lift my hand to her jaw and drag my thumb across her cheek. “I’ll never stop.”

She leans in to kiss me, and something tugs at the bond. I can’t tell if it’s understanding or something opposite. Something that terrifies me for a moment because it reminds me of the last night with Lucifer.

Like he knew he wasn’t going to spend forever with me.

Chapter 36

It’s been a few days since that extremely embarrassing moment of crying on Kayn. He forced me to talk about it, and I did. I’d never been touched like that—ever—even before I was scarred and marred the way I am now. No one’s hands have ever felt safer than his, and the conversation I’d had with Vendra not even an hour earlier had already crushed my heart.

I fell apart because she’s absolutely right: I won’t be able to go through with it. I’m not going to be able to let him go. Maybe that makes me weak, but how could anyone actually walk away from Kayn Butcher?

He may be full of himself, but he’s so fucking perfect. Whatever God wrote him favored him—and me, I suppose, since he actually likes me.

We’ve spent this time in and out of different vehicles that still had gas, but as we suspected, once we got a few hours into Demour, everything was desolate. I ate whatever plants or sealed food containers we found, which somehow was enough for me. We had a few run-ins with Necroth, but most didn’t pay us any mind, and the ones that did lost their heads within seconds to Kayn.

My brute is not fucking around with my safety, and I truly appreciate that. It shows me just how much he cares, not that I really need to see it. I can feel it every second.

Ever since that moment in the truck, any time we stop he’s got his hands all over me. Whether it’s to fuck me, feed from me, or just touch me.

But, as much as he says he doesn’t care, I haven’t been able to shower since that truck stop so I’ve slowly pushed him away. The water may not harm me, but it’s counterintuitive. It’s not clean, so there’s really no point in trying.

What’s a bit of dirt, anyway, considering I’m now standing here looking out at what was once called the Atlantic Ocean. Now it’s forgotten. Only known as the Yulux Passage, named after the lone soul, Amand Yulux, who attempted to reach Old Hearth and never returned.

“I can slightly see the silhouette of Old Hearth from here.” It’s the dead of night, but of course he can see that far.

We’re on an island that broke off from the mainland—barely clinging to the continent by what used to be a bridge—called Atoll. It maybe spans a few miles in each direction, and there isn’t much here besides a few rolling hills and collapsed buildings. There weren’t any Necroth, nor any wildlife at all. I think the only creatures that can survive are those in the reptilian family. I’m pretty sure I saw a few snakes on our way in.