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She gazed at me for a moment, then nodded. "Menolly. But… what happened? Where am I?"
"Do you remember being kidnapped?" I spoke slowly, wanting to break it to her gently in case she didn't fully understand just what had happened. But she surprised me here, too.
"Yeah," she said, her gaze dropping to the ground. "The vampires captured me. They almost killed me."
"They did kill you," I said. "But before you died, we found you. Do you understand?"
As the blood raced through her, strengthening her, she glanced over at Tim. "I'm one of you now," she whispered, looking back at me. "I'm a vampire, and I just fed on my best friend and liked it. I want more. What's going to happen to me?"
I gathered her into my arms and held her tight. The older woman—who would be forever middle-aged with short hair and a little bit of a tummy—hugged me for all she was worth.
"You'll be okay. You don't have to follow a path of terror and destruction. You don't have to turn into a monster. We are predators, true. We feed on blood. Nothing can—or will—change this fact. But you can choose how you respond to the urges, and you can choose who you feed on, and whether you hurt them or give them pleasure. I'm here to help you, and my friends at Vampires Anonymous will help you."
After a moment, I pushed her back to arm's length, looking at her sternly. "But, Erin, know this. I'm your sire. If you do decide to head off into the sunset and go on a killing spree, I'll come for you and I'll stake you. I'll always be able to trace you. Do you understand me?"
Erin shivered. "Yes. I asked for this. I'll never blame you, Menolly."
I bit my tongue. If it hadn't been for me, this never would have happened. Dredge wouldn't be here causing havoc, preying on my friends. But what might have been was irrelevant. What mattered now was where we were.
If there was one thing I'd had to learn over the past twelve years, it was to let go of regret. Baggage, sure, it would always be there, but there was no turning back the clock. We could only change the present and future. And now, my cords to Dredge cleaved, I could focus on destroying him and ridding the world of a terror that should have been obliterated hundreds of years ago.
I looked up at Tim. "Go get Delilah, would you?"
He nodded, scurrying out the door.
Erin gasped suddenly. "I can't breathe!"
"No, remember? You can't, not like you used to. Don't try. Don't let it worry you. As I told you, you won't die, you won't suffocate. You see, we only breathe when we consciously make the effort. Your brain is trying to repeat the patterns that worked for your body in life, but as a vampire you don't need oxygen so your body won't know what to do with it."
"How am I going to learn all of this?" she cried, for the first time looking petrified.
I grabbed her shoulders. "Listen to me. Listen. First, stop struggling. Exhale. Don't inhale, just let go of the breath you tried to take."
She focused on my gaze, and I felt her deflate, the air whistling out of lungs that no longer needed to breathe.
"Good. Now I want you to close your eyes. Look inside of you and pay attention. Are you dizzy? Do you feel like you'll pass out if you don't breathe?"
She obeyed and after a moment of stillness, said, "No. No, I think I see—if I don't struggle for breath, I don't notice that I'm not breathing."
"That's absolutely correct. You'll only go into a panic when your brain tells you to breathe and your body isn't prepared for it. You can take a deep breath and let it out, but you have to prepare the lungs for movement or you'll disrupt your body. It's all part of the transformation." I kept hold of her hands as she focused on relaxing.
Delilah entered the room at that point, followed by Tim. "Is everything okay?" She knelt a few feet away, watching cautiously.
Erin looked over at her. "Hey, Delilah. I… I'm not sure… I mean, what do I do! I can't run my shop, can I? I can't just go home. Menolly, what happens to me next?"
I gave her a gentle smile. "You learn from the best. Delilah, take Roz and go over to Sassy Branson's house. Ask her to come back here. If she's not there, call Wade. In fact, call him first. He specializes in helping newborns adjust." I tossed her my cell phone. "He's in my contact list."
Delilah punched a few buttons. "Static. I'll have to go topside."
"Don't go alone. Take Roz with you. Come back and let me know if you get hold of Wade before you head out for Sassy's. We don't have time to waste so don't dawdle."
Tim cleared his throat. "Erin, I can call someone to take over your shop for a few days. Lindsey, from the Green Goddess Women's Shelter. She has clients who need a temp job." He bit his lip and I shook my head at him, motioning to the blood that welled up on the pale pink flesh. Wiping it away, he shrugged a smile at me.
Erin was still fighting for control. And doing a damned good job. Most vamps went a little crazy when they turned—the ramifications don't sink in until you realize that your entire life has just been turned upside down and you can never, ever go back to the way things were.
"Thanks," she said. "Please, don't tell her what happened. Not yet. I need to come to grips with this first. Just tell her I'm sick."
"No problem," Tim said.
