Page 47 of Temptation On Ice

The goal horn sounds, announcing the end of the game from out in the arena, and I hear the screams of the fans from here. We won the game after all.

“I’m so sorry,” he rasps into my neck.

“Nothing to be sorry about. Just repaying the courtesy of holding you together like you’ve done for me,” I remind him.

“You should be with your team,” he says, panic filling his tone again.

“Nowhere else I’d rather be,” I say evenly, pulling back a bit to look at him. He raises his face and barely meets my eyes before he’s looking at the floor again. “Don't hide from me, Tucker,” I beg, needing him to trust me, to see me and know he’s safe and I’m being so fucking for real with him.

“I made this so much worse,” he says, his voice battered and small. He starts to stand, and I lean into him to get up. I keep him close when we’re both on our feet.

I rub my nose along his ear and smooth my hand on his neck. “Why, because you showed you cared and were worried when I got hurt?” I ask, guessing at the cause of his panic attack.

He pulls away slightly, looking at the floor. “I was fucked up and couldn't tell reality from my past. Even though I knew it was fine, I saw this pattern, and it dragged me into the next worst-case situation when it all went wrong. I couldn't stop it. Everything hit me out of nowhere. It was too much, and I wasn't able to control anything. I know better logically, but I couldn't stop it from repeating over and over until it was all horrible. This was an overreaction, and I made a scene. I’m such a fucking embarrassment. I hate that you saw me like this.” His voice breaks with his shame, and he looks away from me.

“I’ll take seeing you like this over never seeing you, baby. I want you to trust me enough to feel whatever you need to.” I smile and kiss his cheek, which blooms bright red again as his bloodshot blue eyes look up at me with shock before shooting over my shoulder as my teammates file past us noisily.

Tucker starts to remove his arms from my waist quickly, and my smile drops. I grip the back of his hair in my fist and growl, the sound low in my throat.

“Put your hands back, right now, and keep them where they belong,” I order. “You get to hold onto me as long as you need to.” He reverses his movement and resettles his arms around me hesitantly. I tug his hair again, and he holds me tighter. I release my grip and smooth my hand down his neck, rubbing comforting circles now that he’s done what I want.

I look back gingerly, careful of the stretch it puts on my shoulder, and smile at the looks of jubilation and happiness on the faces of my teammates as they troop down the tunnel.

“Hey, Monty, we won! Your goal got us there, and we shut LA out,” Nico shouts, tapping my skate with the end of his stick.

“How you feeling, Cap? That shoulder gonna give you trouble?” Westy asks, stopping next to me.

Tucker stiffens and avoids looking at the guys around us, but he doesn't pull away from me this time. Whatever he’s feeling and thinking, he’s smart enough to know I want him right here, and I’m not taking anything less than his total acceptance.

“I’m better now that I have my guy with me. Nothing hurts as badly when I’m in his arms,” I tell them honestly.

Westy and Nico raise their eyebrows and look at Tucker with new interest. I haven't said anything to the team about my feelings for Tucker. I don't even know what to call this. I haven’t defined what we are with him, and he’s been adamant about not wanting anything with me for whatever reason, but after tonight, I think we can both agree there’s real affection, a hell of a lot of feelings, and a connection neither of us can deny.

“So, you’re, uh, together?” Nico asks, looking at Tucker’s arms around me and my hand keeping his head tucked into my shoulder, face hidden from their prying eyes.

“Fuck, man, you have eyes. If you couldn’t see the mutual pining and interest from across the room, or hell, feel it when you got too close to these two at the last photo shoot with the puppies, you’re not as observant as you think you are,” Westy says, smacking Nico in the chest. “Now leave them alone and let them have their moment together.” He hauls Nico back by the jersey and gives me a wave.

“Ah, you guys look good, Monty,” Ryder calls as he lumbers down the tunnel in his massive gear. “Guess I won’t be the only bi guy on the team after all.”

“I don't know about all that. I just know I like this guy. Labels don't matter to me other than that,” I admit in front of my team, running my hand along Tucker’s back and feeling him melt into me more. Yeah, he likes this more than he’d ever say out loud. Damn, I guess I’m coming out to my team, and it’s not even scary. This feels so right, there’s no other choice, or consideration for how I’d play this. I just want them to know I care about Tucker and he’s going to be a part of my life now.

“Can I get in on that hug next?” Chad asks. “It’s been too long since someone big held me like that.”

“Shut the fuck up, Chad,” I warn. “I wouldn’t hold you if I were freezing, and it was the only thing between life and death.”

“Ouch. Damn, dude. I just want to be loved,” Chad says.

Suddenly, a stick comes up between his legs and hits him with a quick tap. He lets out a surprised yelp and drops to his knees.

“Stay on your knees and maybe you’ll find someone who will put up with your stupid jokes,” Davy says as he looms over Chad. “Your mouth makes too much noise. You must be quieter to get the love you want.” The stoic Russian turns away after dropping that truth bomb, and Chad with a nut tap.

We all watch as he walks toward the dressing room without another word.

“You took that stick like a good boy, Chad. Falling on your knees, ready for more,” Ryder says, his grin splitting his face. Chad scowls at him.

“That dude is one scary motherfucker who has it out for your nuts, man,” Nico says, holding out his hand to help Chad up.

Chad takes the help. “Nah, man. He loves these nuts. That’s why he’s always tapping them. Maybe Davy is my person after all.”