Page 70 of Ashborne: Defiance

How Voski did it all, and slept less, I didn’t know.

Every time we stopped, the moment we’d eaten, I rolled into my cloak, or the crook of Koa’s leg. Yet, while my eyes dragged closed the moment I stopped moving, he left the fire to spend time with his dragon.

I asked Koa about it the second day.

‘Are we supposed to do as they do and talk at this time?’

‘No. Sleep, Firebird. The mate holds burden. Rest. Your body depletes.’

I hated that she could tell that, but I knew it was true. I’d tucked myself into the crook of her leg, while she laid her wing over me to keep the warmth in, and promptly fell asleep before I could finish the thought that I should ask Voski if he needed help.

That evening—because we’d slept during the day—I was woken by Koa and when she lifted her wing, Voski stared down at me from beyond the curl of her leg and tail.

There were dark smudges under his eyes. His hair fell in stringy strands, and his high cheekbones seemed even more hollow than usual.

“Are you losing weight?” I blurted before I’d properly woken up.

He frowned, but didn’t respond. “Go wash and ready. We slept long. We need to get moving.”

I nodded and pushed to my feet, thanking Koa for keeping me warm in the dark shadows here, and stumbled off to relieve my body, and use the little creek to wash my face and hands, and the back of my neck.

The moment I returned, Voski put himself at Kham’s side, fingers laced to help boost me up the mounting strap.

We didn’t even speak.

I took a deep breath and prayed my strength would hold out long enough to get to Kham’s back.

When I lost my grip halfway up, it didn’t matter, because Voski was directly behind me. He caught my weight and steadied me until I could find my grip and start climbing again. Then, with quiet, calm instructions, showed me how to lean out against him, bracing both feet on Kham’s shoulder, to give my arms a rest for a moment.

Then he used his hand as a seat to push me up onto his dragon’s withers.

When I straddled Kham’s back, arms trembling and heart pounding, Voski hauled himself up behind me, barely breathing quickly.

That moment when he hooked an arm around me to grasp the strap on the other side, pinning me as he used it to heave himself into place never failed to make my chest flutter.

But even though I watched him, he never looked at me. And when Kham started moving, we had to focus on the launch.

I knew I was weak when Kham took one slightly jarring step just before that powerful down-flap to get airborne.

I squawked and yanked up on the neck strap as they’d had taught me, but my weight had shifted in the bounce, and I started sliding off sideways.

Voski, unflustered, hooked an arm around my waist and stopped my inexorable slide.

But the sheer force needed to keep Kham pushing away from the earth and into the sky meant it was everything I could do to merely cling on. I couldn’t pull myself back up to my seat against the fierce pull of gravity and the dragon’s bulk pushing up underneath me. I dangled off his neck. At any moment I might topple, and I was terrified I wouldn’t have the strength to remount in the air. I gasped and clung, my heart hammering in my chest.

“Don’t worry. I’ve got you.” Voski had leaned forward, curling his arm around me, his jaw brushing my ear as I sank to the side. “Once he’s leveled out, I’ll get you back up. Just breathe.”

The words were reassuring, and delivered in a low gravel that made goosebumps prickle under my ear and down my back.

I was always aware of him, but keenly aware when he touched me. And for those minutes while we waited for Kham to climb, he held me. The flames in my blood that had been so demanding during Koa’s heat, flickered to life again.

My cheeks heated and I started to sweat.

Voski’s breathing grew heavier, fluttering in my hair and across my cheek. The pebbling on my skin increased.

When Kham finally leveled out, Voski did help me back up to my secure seat without a fuss. But by then, my cheeks were beet red, my chest pounded, and my hands shook not just with weariness but with want?

What was wrong with me?