Page 74 of Burn Protocol

My lungs protest as my breathing speeds up and I let out a high-pitched wheezing sound. Maya’s guarded expression immediately falters and is replaced with worry. Her hand shoots out to steady me as her eyes search my face.

“Elena?”

I shake my head and squeeze my eyes shut for a moment. Her hand moves from my arm to my shoulder, where she starts rubbing in slow circles.

“What happened?”

Her voice is so small and so filled with worry that I force my eyes open again. How can I say no to her, to this? To the woman who cares more about me than her own feelings. Because even at my worst, even after hurting her, she still goes out of her way to make me feel safe. Denying her, denying us, is the greatest mistake of my life. My career means nothing anymore, not if it means losing her. I can’t. Not after having a taste of what it could be like.

“I was wrong,” I rasp.

She frowns and looks at me, the question clear on her face.

“There was a girl. Trapped in a car, we needed to extract. She was terrified, Maya. And all I could hear was your voice, begging me to do something about it. To help her.”

Her eyes grow large but she stays quiet.

“Between the accident, her unconscious mother, and the cutter, I thought it would be nice for her to see a friendly face.”

“You took your mask off,” Maya gasps.

The terror that shows on her face at that realization makes me wince. I reach for her and shake my head. Again, the feeling of disbelief washes over me.

“A stupid lapse in judgment, really.”

“But your lungs?”

“Minor smoke inhalation. Just an irritated throat and a mild cough. Nothing that won’t pass over the next couple of days. Trust me, I’ve seen worse.”

Her lips tremble at that, but she only nods. Even in this moment she understands what the job means. The risks that come with it. I reach up to cup her face and brush my thumb over her bottom lip. Her eyes close instantly and she leans into my touch. The tears that were brimming in my eyes now flow over.

“Maya… I…”

Her eyes snap open and she stares at me, her eyes flicking quickly from one side to the other. Her jaw tenses under my fingertips and she rolls her shoulders forward, ready to bolt at any moment. But she doesn’t move away from my touch, from me. She just stands there, like a deer caught in the headlights.

“I don’t want this to be it,” I whisper, my voice raw.

I look up at her for an answer when the door swings open and she pushes herself away from me. My hand is still suspended in the air when Torres enters. He freezes instantly, his eyes sliding from me to Maya and back.

“Keep. Moving.” I growl low.

He scoffs and pushes past us, pressing me to the other side of the hallway. His eyes roll as he walks by. The anger inside me flares up instantly and I have to fight the urge to drag him down by his hair and punch him in the face.

I grit my teeth and flare my nostrils, but he completely ignores me. Fucking rat. He doesn’t deserve to call himself a firefighter, betraying his coworkers like that. People like him are a disgrace to the uniform.

“El?” Maya’s soft whisper pulls me out of my fury and my eyes are instantly on her.

“I… he…” I sigh. “It’s not relevant.”

She nods once, understanding. She glances at the door quickly, and then back at me. I can see the hesitation in her eyes, the tremble in her body. I hold my breath waiting for her to decide if I am worth staying for.

“I don’t want this to be it, either,” she sighs.

She rubs her hand over her face as if she is tired of fighting. I know I am.

“Then stay.”

Her nod is weak, but the answer is clear. In this moment, in this dinky hallway of this smelly firehouse, Maya Carter chooses to stay. She chooses to stay for me.